He’d noticed it on Lil’s face earlier, and the spark of awareness that bounced between them now was almost tangible.
The day was a scorcher, the sun blazing in the afternoon sky. Yet it was the waves of sexual tension simmering between Angus and Lily that had Blake sweating.
Angus smiled at her, the heat in his gaze unmistakable. “The lavender in your garden isn’t enough?”
Angus might treat Lily like a princess, but he watched her with heavy-lidded, predatory eyes. It was that wanton look that turned Blake the fuck on. Lil’s response to it too. The reddening of her cheeks and the laughter she couldn’t contain. Blake wanted in. He wanted to share the spark.
“I love it, as you know. There’s no such thing as enough lavender.”
Angus considered the plant. “Maybe. I know it thrives in the Hunter, but I’d have to investigate how it’ll interact with the vines. It may change the soil and affect the way the grapes grow.”
Angus’s gaze flickered from Lily to Blake, and then to the spot where their bodies touched. It stayed there for a second, before landing on Blake’s arm, the one resting on Lily’s shoulder, his hand inches away from her breast.
Angus pressed his lips together, then turned and headed to the place he’d indicated the pergola should stand.
Lily watched him walk away. “God, he’s gorgeous. I’d love to paint him some day.”
“Naked?”
She rolled her eyes at Blake. “Have I ever painted anyone naked?”
“No. But you obviously like him. And he has the body for it.”
“Actually, I was thinking I’d like to paint him shirtless. Working in the garden. But nude’s good too.” She raised an eyebrow. “Interesting suggestion, by the way. Especially coming from you.”
“You blush when you look at him, Lil. And laugh to yourself. Doesn’t take a rocket scientist to realize you like him.”
“I blush when I look at you too. And laugh. Doesn’t mean I’ve ever painted you naked.”
He threw her a cocky grin. “Would you like to?”
Yeah, right. As if he’d ever have the self-control to sit around, nude, with Lily’s gaze on him for hours. At least making light of the situation helped ease the ache in his balls.
“Sure,” she teased right back. “Just as soon as you tell me you love me.”
The words were there. On the tip of his tongue. Christ knew he wanted to say them. Always wanted to say them. But confessing his true feelings for Lil would also be deceiving her. Because no matter how much he loved her—and his love went way beyond the bond they’d built as friends—he could never give her everything she needed. He could never give her one hundred percent of himself.
The fact that he’d responded so viscerally to Angus reinforced that intrinsic knowledge.
Yeah, Blake wanted Lily with a desire so raw and basic, it hurt being around her. But the love of a woman would never meet all of his needs. As much as he ached for her, he also desired the touch of a man. One lover could not fulfill him, and he would never pretend to himself or to Lil that it could.
He loved her too much to lie, and confessing the truth—that he liked men and women, and that she alone would never be enough for him—would only hurt her. It was easier to avoid the subject.
“Telling you I love you now would be a waste of good breath. You only have eyes for Angus.”
“Can you blame me?”
“No.” But he could feel a surge of irrational jealousy.
“Hah.” She raised her fist in triumph.
“Hah, what?”
“I knew you’d understand.”
“And how did you know that?”
Lily slipped out from under his arm and patted his cheek tenderly. “Because, my dear and trusted friend, I’m not the only one. One need just glance in your direction to realize you too only have eyes for Angus.”
With that, she waltzed off across the garden to join the other man, leaving Blake gaping at her back.
Shit. She was too damn perceptive for her own good. But then she was also wrong.
Learning to Kill: Stories