of making love to
him surface. Almost immediately, panic tried to overwhelm her, but she pushed
it down. Addison would never hurt her. His longtime friendship with her father
assured that. Plus, he wasn’t that kind of a man. Sure, he dated around, but
that didn’t make him a rotten person who would take advantage of a woman.
When
he reached up and brushed a strand of hair from her face, she tried not to
flinch, but it happened before she could stop it. She knew her reaction stemmed
from the direction her thoughts had taken, not because she hadn’t enjoyed him touching
her, but he didn’t know that. The hurt and confusion on his face mirrored the
look he’d given her Saturday morning.
“ I have to keep reminding myself that you’re Dixon’s
daughter.” His voice was soft but so damn sexy it took her by surprise, as did
his cryptic remark. “I suppose this is the worst possible time to tell you
this, but I have to say it. The longer I hold it in, the worse it’ll be, and we
might be on the surface for weeks. I need to get this out.”
A
shiver ran down her spine as she realized his words eerily echoed her own
decision only moments ago.
“ Nadine … shit. Please don’t be upset with me for
saying this.”
What
the hell was he about to tell her? It couldn’t be any worse than the secret
she’d been holding inside for four years. “I won’t be. Just say it.”
“ Okay. I’ve always had a thing for you. Ever since you
were legal.”
Holy shit.
“ Um, let me rephrase that so it doesn’t sound creepy. I
didn’t lust after you when you were a kid. That’s not what I mean.”
She
swallowed hard and nodded because her voice seemed to have disappeared.
“ I kept it to myself for your father’s sake. I don’t
mean because he told me to stay away once you were out of high school. He
doesn’t know I still feel this way. I mean out of respect for him. Otherwise I
would have asked you out again, and I would have kept asking you out until you
said yes.”
She
was stunned into silence. He looked so expectant, so unsure of her reaction,
and she realized what an effort telling her that must have been for him. But
the muscles in her mouth simply would not move.
“ I know. Don’t say it. I’m a giant shit for telling you
all this now. I don’t even know why I did. You just looked so … I don’t know.
Vulnerable, I guess, and lost. I had this overwhelming need to protect you, and
I realized you had a right to know how I feel.”
“ Addison, I…” She what? How on earth could she tell him
this now, after what he’d just confessed? But if not now, when? He had to know.
He
brushed a finger along her hair, and she let out a shaky breath. The mere act
of touching her again sent her hormones racing. She had to get this out so he
could stop thinking he’d done something wrong. She wanted him, but Nadine knew
she had a shitload of mental work to do before she could ever reach that stage.
She wasn’t even sure she could reach
it. She hadn’t tried in four years.
This
sure as hell wasn’t the right time to find out, was it?
He
cupped her face, and this time she gasped softly. “It’s all right. You don’t
have to say anything if you aren’t comfortable doing so. It’s enough to see
that look in your eyes.”
What look? Shit. Time to speak.
It’s now or never.
Nadine
took a deep breath. She didn’t think about what she was going to say. She
merely let the words come out. “Addison, I think you’re the most drop-dead
gorgeous man I’ve ever seen.” All true. “Under better circumstances, it wouldn’t matter if I was my father’s daughter.” True again. Now for the hard part. “I
have to be honest, though.” He won’t like
this. “I don’t want to be just one more woman who makes the gossip columns
with you.”
Coward. Talk about taking the easy way out.
He
shook his head. “I don’t want that either. I swear it. I was like that. I admit
I was, but I’m not that man