The Bark Tree by Raymond Queneau Read Free Book Online

Mme. Pigeonnier’s maid singing a sentimental song. The druggist’s son goes off on his bicycle; he’s going to watch the E.C.F. team play the A.S.T.V. In the distance, the trains whistle. The flies apathetically drag themselves through the tired air; here and there they hold conferences around various sorts of refuse. Etienne comes out of his doze and goes and fetches his Sunday meerschaum; he fills it, he lights it, he puts it in his mouth, he pulls at it (not the way people pull in a tug of war), and the smoke spreads out around his head, but hasn’t enough energy to climb even up to the lowest branches of the Lime Tree.
    At about 2 o’clock, they decide to go for a walk in the woods around the old castle, in Obonne. Dressing operations. Théo thinks up various methods of escape; next year, he’ll start playing games; that’ll save his Sundays for him. He incidentally touches his genitals, but doesn’t insist. He’s the first to be dressed in his Sunday best. Etienne next; he’s put on his beautiful straw hat with the serrated edges, and is whistling. He’s certainly not there.
    At last, the mother’s ready; very elegant, the mother. Théo and Etienne don’t say anything, but they don’t conceal their pride. She works well and, when they take her out, what a beauty! She’s still fussing around quite a bit because everything isn’t just as it should be; at last it’s all right, and they start. The gate squeaks, once, twice, and the three beings make their way to the woods.
    The woods, naturally, are teeming. People have been picnicking, and there are bits of greasy paper all over the place. People are sleeping here and there, couples are tickling each other and women are laughing very loudly. Théo takes a sly look at a girl lying on the ground somewhat immodestly. This gets him into a terrible state; his day hasn’t been wasted. Etienne, on his arm, feels his wife hanging. He takes his family along their habitual route. They’ll go as far as the old castle, rest there, and then go down to the river again; a lemonade at the little café, and then back home.
    The walk takes three hours and is accomplished without a hitch. In any case, it’s a famous walk. The river is charming, at the bottom of the hill and the castle; people come all the way from Paris to see it. They drink the tepid lemonade under the cool arbor. Etienne tells them about the intrigues of the assistant manager in his office. At the next table, a man on his own is drinking the tepid lemonade and listening closely to their conversation; every so often, he casts an admiring eye at Etienne’s wife, but she doesn’t catch it, seeing that she’s got her back turned to him.
    Théo, whose father bores him, has spotted what’s going on, of course; suddenly, he begins to wonder whether that fellow isn’t by any chance? He immediately forgets the woman’s thigh he got a glimpse of just now and becomes passionately interested in this adventure. He’s jubilant, he’s got a secret; now he knows; no more doubt about it, it’s the fellow of the other evening, the day when the train was late. The fellow sees that the brat it watching him and is a bit embarrassed. His embarrassment increases. He blushes. He goes away. Théo is now very annoyed; he shouldn’t have stared at him so obviously. Maybe something would have happened.
    But it’s time to go home. The crowd is starting to make its way to the station. 6:30. They’ll wait half an hour for dinner, then a pipe, then a last walk around the garden, night, sleep. Tomorrow, work begins again.
    —oooooo—oooooo—
    Here, the body is curled up like a fetus, turned in on itself, its fists clenched, it’s met a childhood friend. The friend is dressed as an ambassador. “What are you doing these days?” He doesn’t make excuses for himself. Here’s another childhood friend, a dentist; he tried to combine this position with that of inspector of weights and measures, so he went broke. They are