The Cowboys Heart: 3 by Helen Evans Read Free Book Online Page A

changed this past week, and I was so
confused. I didn’t know what to say to him. All I could think about was how
Jamie would react. When he’d heard Hudson was going to propose, Jamie ran away.
What would he do if he knew Hudson asked and I said yes? And what about
Phillip? Things with him and I were getting better by the day, we were
rekindling the love we once shared.
    “Heather?” Hudson’s voice cracked and he looked like he was
ready to cry.
    “Hudson, I…” I clamped my mouth shut and fought back tears.
I couldn’t break his heart. I did want to marry him, but I had to think of my
son and what this might do to him.
    “Is this because of your ex?” Hudson finally asked, getting
off his knees and sitting beside me again. He snapped the ring box closed, and
I flinched at the sound of my future being stolen from me. “I know you two have
been getting close again. I can see it.”
    I buried my face in my hands and shook my head. “I don’t
know.” Taking a deep breath, I forced myself to look at him. I immediately wish
I hadn’t. He looked so hurt and rejected. I couldn’t image how he must feel
right now. He loved me. I loved him. Yet, we were growing distant, both of us
unsure of the other. How did we get here? I thought for sure we were headed
exactly for this moment – for marriage and maybe kids.
    “It’s okay,” Hudson said, his voice full of defeat. “I’m not
going to go anywhere unless you tell me to.” He smiled tightly and nudged me
with his shoulder, but he wouldn’t meet my gaze. I guess I couldn’t blame him.
I’d be feeling the same way if I’d asked him such a monumental question and he
shot me down.
    I turned on the log to face him and took his hands into
mine, squeezing them reassuringly. “This doesn’t change how I feel about you,
Hudson. I love you. I just need some time to figure a few things out. Please
understand.”
    “I do,” he said. “Any idea how long it’ll take you to figure
things out?”
    I laughed, and he smiled. “Not long. I promise. In fact,
Jamie’s birthday party is on Friday. Phillip will be leaving on Monday. Then
you and I can focus on us again.”
    Hudson caressed my cheek, and I closed my eyes, leaning into
his touch. God, I’d missed him so much. I was always so relaxed with him; it
was so easy to be myself. Unlike with Phillip where I was constantly on edge.
What the heck was I doing? Why didn’t I just say yes to Hudson right now?
    Jamie.
    I sighed. It was time I had a long talk with my dear son. He
knows all I’ve ever wanted was for him to be happy, but he couldn’t dictate my
life in order for that to happen, and it was past time for me to make that
clear. As soon as his birthday was over and his dad left, I’d tell him. Then
I’d tell Hudson yes.
    “Well, like I said, I’m not going anywhere. Neither is my
proposal.” He winked. “If you decide you want…him, and to have your family back
intact, I’ll understand. I won’t like it, but I won’t bother you either.”
    That’s when I felt the first tear slip down my cheek. I
hated that Hudson was thrown into the middle of all my family drama. He was too
good of a man to have to deal with crap like this. But, here he was, sticking
it out, never once leaving my side.
    “Hey, why don’t you come to Jamie’s party?” I said, trying
to change the subject and lighten the mood. “I think it would do all of us some
good to spend time together like that.” I smiled.
    “You sure he isn’t going to mind?”
    “No, of course not! My parents will be there, too, so…
Please? I’d really like you to be there.” I looked up at him hopefully. Not
only did I want him there, I needed him to be there. I needed the constant
physical reminder that Hudson was my future and Phillip was my past. If Phillip
and I had this party together, it would be too much like old times. And I
didn’t want to give Phillip anymore ideas than he already had. I’d barely
avoided having that conversation