The Dangerous Days of Daniel X by James Patterson, Michael Ledwidge Read Free Book Online Page A

expecting an answer. That was my first sign that she wasn’t too pleased about Phoebe.
    Afterward I treated everyone to pizza, but I made the mistake of letting Joe order.
    “No, not one
with
everything,” I heard him tell the phone person at Domino’s. “One
of
everything. I’d like the entire menu. In fact, make it two entire menus.”
    “Domino’s?” Emma said in shock. “If you want to kill yourself, fine, but I don’t do processed flour. Hello? This is California. There has to be a Whole Foods around here somewhere.”
    She was already searching the Yellow Pages when the phone rang. I figured it was the pizza place, confirming Joe’s insane order.
    “Hello?” I said.
    “Hello, indeed,” a cultured voice said.
    It was Seth. Don’t ask me how I knew for sure, I just did. Just like I knew he was the one who’d trashed my place with his crazy felines.
    “Who’s this?” I said, playing dumb.
    “Who’s
this?
” the voice repeated almost sorrowfully. “Now is that remotely proper etiquette? Wouldn’t ‘May I help you?’ be a tad more polite? Bad enough they send a boy for me, but a crude American one with no manners? Nonetheless, to answer your impolite question, I think you know who I am. Though I daresay, if you don’t follow my advice very, very soon, you’re going to wish you did not.”
    “Um, sorry?” I said, still stunned. I’d never spoken to a gas before, let alone one that sounded like it had trained with the Royal Shakespeare Company. “I really think you have the wrong number.”
    “Better the wrong number,” the confident British voice said, “than the wrong city, Daniel. By the way, I heard you had a little problem today—with kitty cats. Or should I say
kitty litter?
”
    Panic rose at the mention of my name. And the cats.
    Ergent Seth not only knew where I was, he knew
who
I was!
    Chapter 29
    “OH, YES,” Seth leisurely continued. “I know who you are, Dan. In fact, I’ve been patiently waiting for you ever since that unfortunate accident with that silly Arbilitorarian pretender in the sewers of Portland.
    “Perhaps you are under the impression that there is some similar business to take care of between you and me. But there is not. Because of your youth, I am paying you this final courtesy. You can’t say I didn’t give you fair warning. First the dream. Then the visit from my feline friends. Now an actual phone call.
    “Move on! Skip me and go on to the next on your
List,
if that is your foolish desire. To each his own, or, as my American friends so charmingly say, it’s a free country. But if you value your life, then you do not wish to meet with me, little boy—for I am death its very self.
Nothing
that has ever encountered me has lived to tell the tale.”
    Seth was more like a
gasbag
than a gas, I thought. He sure seemed to love the sound of his own voice. Too bad I didn’t.
    “Okay. That’s interesting. But my name’s not Daniel, and I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I said, still playing dumb. “You have a good day.”
    I hung up on him.
    Then I nearly jumped out of my skin as the phone rang again.
    I bent down immediately and ripped the cord out of the wall.
    But as I stood there, something happened that shook my confidence a little. The phone, with its tattered cord dangling beside it, rang again.
    Cold beads of sweat were rolling down my spinal column. My heart was pounding.
    The answering machine beside the phone picked up after the second ring.
Was that even possible?
    “Dan? Hello? I do believe we’ve become disconnected,” the clipped British voice said from the speaker. “Never say I didn’t give you a chance, dear boy. The kid gloves are now officially off. You are now Dead Boy Walking.”
    Seth began to chuckle softly. The chuckle morphed into a bloodcurdling kind of clicking sound. Like a cricket, a thousand-pound one.
    All of a sudden, my lungs and face were burning. Then I started gagging. I opened my mouth to tell my