The Fairyland Murders by J.A. Kazimer Read Free Book Online Page B

Four against two if I counted the chick with the wings, but a glance at Izzy suggested I was on my own. She was pissed all right, but not at the goon slobbering all over her.
    Nope, her anger was directed at me. For what reason I had no idea. But her glare was enough to make me question her sanity and my decision to help her. I didn’t need her hostility, not now. Not when I could very well end up needing stitches.
    â€œCome on.” I held up my hands to appease the Shadows as well as the clearly insane, soon-to-be Tooth Fairy. “No need for violence.” As the words left my mouth I smiled, plowing my fist into Licker Boy’s skull again. This time he stumbled, falling to his knees.
    Score one for the Blue team.
    Unfortunately, the other dark degenerates rushed to his aid, and I soon found myself buried under six hundred pounds of surprisingly heavy darkness.
    At this point I had two options: take a beating like a man or fight back. Me being me, I picked the less painful but more effective method. I reached in the waistband of my jeans, withdrew my really big gun, and shot the first shadowy appendage I saw. It turned out to be a foot, if the spray of toenails followed by loud whimpering was any indication.
    Jamming another round in the chamber, I fired again, this time into the midsection of Licker Boy, who’d joined the fray midpummel and was currently using my organs as a piñata.
    Festive sure, but it also hurt like hell.
    â€œThis ain’t over. Count on it,” Licker Boy yelped, vanishing, trench coat and all, in a wisp of smoke. The remaining four—or rather three and seven-eighths—Shadows disappeared as well, leaving me on the floor covered in blood, mostly theirs, and toe jam.
    Izzy knelt down next to me, a frown pulling at her mouth. “Are you done playing around?”
    I waggled my head to clear the tiny blue buzzards circling my skull and stared disbelievingly at the winged pain in the ass. Did she think I got off on getting my ass kicked by a bunch of smoke clouds? I should walk away, forget all about the crazed half fairy, her dim-witted uncles, and the assassin stalking her. But no one, not even when I went full-on, bug-zapper light, had ever called me bright.
    â€œIf you don’t mind,” she glared at me, “I’ve had enough drama for one night. I want to go.” Something flickered across her face. Fear? Concern? Boredom? Who could tell? When I failed to snap to attention, she added, “Now. Before they come back.”
    â€œSmartest thing you’ve said all night,” I mumbled. My head felt like a lead weight and discarded peanut shells clung to every inch of my backside. The aroma of moldy beer drifted from my clothes. Just another Thursday night.
    Izzy reached out her hand to help me up, but I refused, slowly staggering to my feet under my own volition. She followed me toward the door. We passed the Ferns, who cackled with delight at either my sorry appearance or, much more likely, at Izzy’s nagging screech.
    â€œWhat were you thinking, taking on those Shadows?” Izzy shook her head as we left the bar. “Do you have some kind of death wish?”
    Until this morning I would’ve answered with a definite no. But I was quickly seeing the advantage of a dirt nap. For one thing, if dead, I wouldn’t have a five-foot fairy threatening to lift me in a fireman’s carry.
    â€œDamn it.” I shoved at her shoulders with my leather-clad hands when she stepped too close for comfort. “I can walk all on my own.”
    â€œUh-huh,” she said.
    To prove it I started to do just that, and then promptly fell on my ass. Some days it wasn’t worth getting out of bed. “Not one word.”
    With an eye roll, she plopped down on the sidewalk next to me. I focused my energy on staunching the flow of blood from the wound on my forehead. An intense light began to burn in my chest, growing hotter and bluer with