man, seriously, there isn’t anyone throwin’ what you’re throwin’ out there. I’ve faced a lot of guys over the last couple years. You’ve got it all over them.”
The compliment makes me smile, the first real smile in a long time. We continue to take turns, hitting, catching, and throwing the ball around ; taking and offering advice to each other just like old times. When the sun begins to set, we finally realize how much time has passed.
“Yo, I better get back. I turn into a pumpkin if I’m not home by a certain time ,” I tease, hating that we have to end our fun.
“Then we better get goin’ ,” Mikey agrees as he tosses the loose balls into the bucket.
As we walk the familiar route back to our house, Mikey mentions something about his stopover in Florida, which in turn, sends me back to what’s now becoming my normal crappy self. For some reason, the good times don’t last for long.
“Why did you say you had to stopover in Florida , again?” I question in my Mr. Hyde voice.
Mikey looks at me in a funny way, the tone of my voice catch ing him off guard. I’m sure he’s wondering what brought on the sudden mood change.
“I hadn’t been home since April and I had to check on a few things ,” he says casually, shrugging his shoulders.
“I’ll bet . Check on a few things ,” I reply sarcastically with a cynical laugh.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” He laughs, shrugging off my sarcasm.
“Check on a few things or check on someone ?” I ask, not bothering to hide my sudden aggression towards him.
“Luke , if you want to ask me somethin’, go ahead. What’s on your mind?” He stands in front of me, blocking me from moving forward, forcing me to stop while he stares me in the eyes.
“Are you fuckin’ her?!” I blurt out angrily, glaring back.
“What? Who?” Mikey asks defensively, momentarily looking confused.
“You know who . Don’t fuck with me, be honest!” I shout as we stand at the end of the street. My anger gets the best of me as we stand face-to-face. I know I crossed the line as soon as the words spill from my mouth.
“I’m not even goin’ to answer that. Just because you’ve been living with a bunch of fuckin’ animals the last couple of years, doesn’t give you the right to treat everyone like shit. If you even have to ask me that , then fuck you! Honestly, I’m sick of your bullshit! Everyone’s been walkin’ on eggshells around you since you’ve been home. You’ve got your mom and your sister’s stomachs in knots; they don’t know what the hell to say to you, always afraid to upset you! Stop feelin’ fuckin’ sorry for yourself and get on with your life! You’re fuckin’ twenty-one-years-old. You still have your whole life ahead of you!” he shouts, pointing his finger in my face, bumping my shoulder as he storms past me.
I lean back against the blue Ford pick-up at the end of our street and lower my head. I’m already regretting what I’ve implied. We’ve never argued like that before. I stay awhile longer, embarrassed to face everyone at home. When I finally get the nerve to go inside, my mom is in the kitchen, standing by the door.
“What happened?” she asks nervously.
“Nothing ,” I answer, hanging my head low as I head for the steps, taking two at a time. I lay on my bed, feeling like a complete jerk-off as I mull over the last couple of months in my head.
What is wrong with me? He’s right. I’ve barely talked with anyone since I’ve been home . I mean, really talk. It’s all been superficial bullshit. Anytime anyone tries to ask anything of importance, I clam up and head to my room.
After awhile I make my way downstairs, wanting to apologize. “Where’d Mikey go?” I ask my mom sheepishly while she pretends to be immersed in a re-run of CSI on TV.
“He went for a walk with Deanna ,” she replies.
***
(Mikey)
As we stroll along the water, there is a slight breeze rolling off the ocean, cooling the air just