outward vehemence of her denial had lessened a little during her sojourn at Saint Gilesââfor so long as she kept her seclusion, she had been able to insulate herself almost totally from contact with or even mention of other Deryniâbut the dread rekindled and burned ever brighter as she drew closer and closer to Rhemuth and her Deryni son. Only for Kelsonâs sake had she left the abbey even now, anguished by the continuing toll his Deryniness seemed to take in human lives. Not even his young bride had been safe.
And that was why, ultimately, Jehana had finally chosen to leave the cloistered sanctuary of Saint Gilesâ; for Kelson, now nearly six months a widower, would need to take another wife soon to secure the succession. Jehana had no idea what the field of likely candidates might be likeâonly a notion that the right royal bride, chosen according to the standards Jehana espoused, might mitigate the negative aspects of Kelsonâs Deryni blood. Only thus might there be a chance to turn Kelson aside from the path he seemed to have chosen, to lure him away from the evil influences of the other Deryni at court and bring him back to salvation.
The horsesâ shod hooves began to strike more solid footing, picking up the pace as the way became smoother, and Jehana parted the curtains just far enough to glance outside again. Ahead, between the straight figures of Sir Delrae and a tartan-wrapped Cassani officer, she could just see the familiar walls of Rhemuth Castle shimmering silvery and pristine in the spring sunshine, bold against a sky pebbled with tiny white clouds.
White sheep , she thought fiercely to herself, fighting down a lump threatening to rise in her throat. White sheep on a blue hill .â¦
But the childhood image, intended to divert the double pangs of fear and joy at homecoming, did not have the hoped for effect. Far from the meager comfort she had found at Saint Gilesâ, she could feel the old emotions welling upâthe terror for her soul, for Kelsonâs soul, threatening the composure she knew she must regain before she dared face those who would be waiting.
And in the yard at Rhemuth Castle, on the landing of the stair that led to the great hall, Kelson, too, was experiencing no small amount of trepidation at what the coming reunion would bring. Only his Uncle Nigel, Archbishop Cardiel, and Nigelâs two younger sons waited with him for the queenâs arrival. He had thought not to overwhelm her with too many people at first.
âItâs been so long,â Kelson whispered to his uncle, standing at his left elbow. âWhat do you think sheâll be like?â
Nigelâs smile conveyed a reasonable composure as he glanced aside at his royal nephew, but Kelson knew that he, too, had misgivings about his sister-in-lawâs return.
âSheâll be somewhat changed,â the royal duke allowed softly. âHopefully, the changes will be for the better. God knows, sheâll see youâve changed.â
âNot all that much, have I?â Kelson asked, surprised.
Nigel shrugged. âWhat do you think, Kelson? Youâve become a man in her absenceâthe magic all aside. Youâve fought a war, youâve killedâyouâve had to make some very difficult decisions that I certainly wouldnât have wanted to make.â
âIâm told it comes with the job,â Kelson murmured, managing a brief, wry grin.
âAye, but some men do a better job than others,â Nigel returned. âYouâre one of them. Even now, on the eve of another war, youâve kept your personal anger in check when most men of far more experience and years would have let vengeance run wild. I donât know that I could have kept from killing Llewell right there in the cathedral, if Iâd just had my bride butchered before my eyes.â
Kelson half-turned away and began furiously twisting the ring on his little