The Last Good Kiss by James Crumley Read Free Book Online

Traheame, not be your faithful Indian companion," I said.
    "Horseshit."
    37

    "And gunsmoke?"
    "You'll do," he said.
    "How's your ass?"
    "Getting better," he said. "I've survived worse. Of
    course, I was a younger man at the time. But the
    Marine Corps didn't have vodka deliveries."
    "Glad to be of service," I said .
    "It's the boredom that's hard," he said. "I need a
    couple of favors."
    "I'm yours to command."
    "I'd rather it be a favor."
    "Whatever," I said.
    "Get me some reading material," he said. "Paperback novels and popular magazines by the pound-! go through them like a kid through potato chipswhatever you pick up off the shelf will be fine. Also, it would be wonderful if you could arrange to have my
    dinners delivered. I don't care if it comes from McDonald's, just so it isn't hospital food."
    "Okay," I said. "What about the dancing girls and a
    marching band?"
    "I like a man who knows how to entertain," he said.
    "If I'm stuck here too long, maybe you can arrange for
    a working girl interested in oral gratification. But no
    bands. Maybe a string quartet."
    "I'll look into it," I said, "but I can't promise
    anything. I'm out of my territory."
    "If you can't work that foot-shuffling, hayseed,
    ma'am routine," he said, "I've got several interesting
    telephone numbers in San Francisco."
    "Okay," I said. "I've got a favor to ask of you." He
    stopped grinning. "It won't interfere with your errands.
    "
    "What sort of favor?" he asked quietly.
    "Seems that Rosie has this runaway daughter," I
    said, "and I told her I'd look into it while you were in
    the hospital, if it was all right with you."
    38
    After a moment, he said, "It's all right with me. I like
    to see a young man trying to get ahead in the world."
    "I don't know if I qualify as a young man anymore,"
    I said, "and I don't give a shit about getting ahead. I
    like the old lady and I said I'd do her the favor. If you
    don't mind."
    "I don't mind," he answered.
    "Probably a waste of money and time," I said.
    "How much money?"
    "Eighty-seven dollars," I answered, and he grinned
    again.
    "Hell, how much time can you waste for eighty-seven
    dollars?"
    "Whatever time I spend will be wasted," I said.
    "Why?"
    "The daughter ran away ten years ago, and that's
    too--"
    "By god, I seem to have some drunken recollection
    of Rosie telling me that," Traheame said quickly, then
    shook his head. "I'm afraid this is my fault."
    "How's that?" I asked.
    "I'm afraid that I told her that a private eye would
    come sniffing down my cold, cold trail," he said, then
    hit the bottle, "and suggested that she hire him.
    Thought that it might divert whomever Catherine sent
    for a few more days." He laughed. "So how can I
    mind?" he added. "How do you go about this missing
    person business?"
    "Depends on who's missing and how long," I said,
    "but mostly I just poke around."
    "Doesn't sound like much of a method."
    "If you want method, you hire one of the big security
    outfits," I said. "They're · great at method. Straight
    people don't know how to disappear, and crooks can't
    because they have to hang out with other crooks."
    "And where do you fit in?"
    "I'm cheaper," I said, "and my clients usually still
    39
    believe in the small, independent operator. They're
    usually romantics."
    "You must be working all the time," Trahearne said
    with a chuckle.
    "And every year I have to tend bar more often," I
    said.
    "By god, boy, I knew right away that there was
    something I liked about you," he said.
    "Everybody likes bartenders," I said. "By the way,
    your ex-wife asked me to tell you that Melinda was
    home, throwing fits or something."
    "Pots."
    "What?"
    "My wife," he explained. "She's a potter and a
    ceramic sculptor."
    "Oh."
    "I can see by your face, boy, that you aren't aware of
    my situation," he said grimly. Since I wasn't, I didn't
    say anything. "We all live together-<>r nearly
    together-my mother, my ex-wife, my present wife,
    and me on a little ranch outside Cauldron Springs."
    Trahearne