The Nature of Cruelty by L. H. Cosway Read Free Book Online Page A

flourish.
    Robert begins chuckling. “Are you shitting me?”
    I shrug. “You’ve always loved yourself more than anyone else.”
    “Well, that’s definitely insulting, though I do agree with the bit about him being a handsome young man.” He gives me a devious grin.
    “I’m only basing the statement on what I know of you,” I add, embarrassed.
    Now he gets serious. “You haven’t known me for six whole years, Lana. I’m not a bratty teenage boy anymore.”
    I breathe out heavily. “Okay, I’ll admit you’re not as bad as you were. From what I can tell so far, you’ve grown up some.”
    He ignores my comment and asks, “How do you know all that stuff anyway, about gods and goddesses?”
    I pat dry his hand. “That’s what I’m studying for my doctorate, ancient Greek mythology.”
    He seems amused. “And what does one do with a qualification like that?”
    “Lots of things. I want to lecture and write books on the subject. It’s going to take a long time, but I’ll get there eventually.”
    Robert makes a face. “I’ve never been a fan of academics. I prefer to get out in the world and make something of myself.”
    Slowly, I begin wrapping the bandage around his hand. “Well, I suppose we all want different things from life.”
    “So what are you going to write your thesis on? Please tell me it’s about sex between the gods. I’d love to see you give a presentation on that.”
    I cock an eyebrow. “Uh, why?”
    “Oh, come on, it’d be hilarious. Someone as shy as you talking about lascivious gods and how they liked to get their jollies. I remember seeing this engraving in the British Museum of a guy sporting a massive erection. Half the stuff in there was downright pornographic.” He puts on a face as though offended, but I know too well that it’d take a lot more than a few rude engravings to offend Robert.
    I burst into laughter. When I finally calm down, I say, “That was probably Priapus, the god of fertility. It’s where the word ‘priapism’ comes from. You know, when a man’s, um, thing...won’t go down.”
    At this Robert lets out a delighted chuckle. “His thing? Have you ever seen a man’s thing in the flesh, Lana?”
    I give him a warning stare, and he sobers up.
    “I’ll admit that sex is a pretty big part of the myths,” I go on. “Those Greeks had some seriously dirty minds. But no, you’ll be disappointed to learn that’s not what I’m writing my thesis on. I actually haven’t settled on a subject yet. I’ve had several theories accepted by my supervisor, but I don’t know, none of them feel exactly...right. It’s frustrating, because I feel like what I truly want to write about is on the tip of my tongue, hovering just outside my reach. Sometimes I almost grasp it, but then I lose it again. You know what I mean?”
    I realise I’ve been gesturing with my hands when I look back at Robert. His eyes take me in, as though fascinated. I always get a little overly animated when I start talking about my subject. I can’t help it; these things just excite me.
    Robert clears his throat with a cough, then says, “Yeah, I know what you mean.”
    A silence ensues as I finish up with the bandage. I tie a little knot and cut off the end of the roll. Then I stand up and go to rinse my hands in the sink. Once I’m done I turn back to Robert, who’s still sitting on the edge of the tub, looking at me.
    “I better get back downstairs and let you go, uh, grab a clean shirt. Gary left two big suitcases full of your stuff in the hall, by the way.”
    Robert sighs. “Yeah, I saw. And thanks...for the bandage.”
    I nod, giving him one last glance, and then leave the room. Well, that was different. My stomach rushes with shallow victory as I hear his words echo in my head: You were always something, but you really did turn into a swan, didn’t you, Lana?
    If I was always something, then why did he make me feel so ugly? I don’t get it.
    But it does make me feel good to