who’s seeking outformer patients to give them back their memories. Yeah, you’re terrible, Michael.”
Realm smiled, the combination of Anthony’s forgiveness and James’s comment hitting him in the right way, making it a good day. He hoped the first of many, or at least a few.
“All right, fine,” James said. “We’ll spend the night in Ashland, and then . . . then tomorrow I’ll go home. But I’m telling Sloane it was your idea.”
“Maybe she’ll hate me a little less.” Realm was struck with a bit of sadness at the reminder of her feelings.
“She still cares about you, otherwise she couldn’t hate you at all,” James said evenly. “She’ll forgive you.”
Realm thought about the file in his bag, the one with Sloane’s name on it. He’d be lying if he didn’t admit that giving it to her had been his end goal, the last piece in his guilt puzzle. But now he realized it wasn’t about him. He’d give James the file to bring to her. Realm didn’t need or deserve her gratitude. Those were her thoughts, her memories. He wouldn’t take credit for giving them back.
The SUV cleared the mountains, and Realm leaned his elbow on the door. “I could really go for an apple pie,” he mumbled.
• • •
The hotel was a step up from the Sunset Grove. The halls were indoors and the lobby promised a continental breakfast with waffles in the morning. Once upstairs, Realm gave James the folder and asked him to give it to Sloane. He agreed, and Realm wasn’t surprised when James put it away without reading it.
He admired him, and not just because of his relationship with Sloane. James always did what he thought was right, even if meant losing himself. Even if it meant looking like anasshole. Realm’s biggest regret was agreeing to the handler contract. If James had been offered the same thing, Realm was sure he would have figured a way out without being lobotomized.
But James wasn’t offered a contract. Instead, he’d taken the Treatment and would have his own responsibilities to carry for the rest of his life. But Realm was certain he’d figure out how, and that Sloane would be there to help him.
Realm closed his eyes on the hotel room bed, pushing away the sadness that came with thinking of Sloane. And instead he tried to be happy for James, for Anthony and Ally. For Dallas. He even tried to find a little bit of happiness for himself.
CHAPTER TEN
REALM WOKE TO THE SOUND of a vacuum in a neighboring room. He groaned and turned to look at the clock on the side table, noting it was after nine. “James, get up,” he said, and swung his legs out from under the sheets. There was no answer.
“James.” He turned to the other bed, but found it empty. Realm ran his hand through his hair, and then he noticed that James’s backpack was gone. Realm jumped up and crossed the room, his heart thumping.
There was a note scratched on the hotel stationery next to the bed. Realm’s pulse quieted, his initial fear a side effect of The Program. He was sure he’d never stop checking over his shoulder, even though there was no longer anyone pursuing them.
Realm picked up the note and dropped onto the bed to read it.
Michael,
Sorry, I hate good-byes. I’m catching a bus back home, but you needto finish your list. Not for them, for you. You deserve to be happy. And if you don’t believe it, imagine me standing there telling you you’re being a dipshit.
I’m proud of you. See you soon.
—J
Realm smiled to himself and folded the note. He brought it over to his duffel bag and stashed it inside. He took in a heavy breath and scanned the empty room, fighting the loneliness that wanted to sink in. There were three more people on the list. After that—maybe he could return home, start over. Maybe then he’d be proud of himself .
Realm showered and got dressed, packing up his things and checking over the list: Drea, Asa, and Tabitha. He had an idea of where to start looking for them. He’d keep
Learning to Kill: Stories