The Tanners by Robert Walser Read Free Book Online Page B

moderation, purpose, and who knows what else. But to whom
     would it ever occur to start demanding virtues from a business owner such as
     yourself? Should my strength, my desire for activity, the pleasure I take in
     my
     own person, and the talent for being so gloriously capable of all these things
     be squandered on an old, meager, narrow bookshop? No, before I do any such
     squandering, I might join the army and sell my freedom altogether, if only for
     the sake of getting rid of it. It does not please me, respected sir, to own a
     half-measure, I would prefer to number among those who are utterly
     without possessions, for then at least my soul will still belong to me. You may
     be thinking it’s inappropriate for me to speak with such vehemence, and that
     this is not a fitting place for a speech: So be it, I shall hold my tongue, pay
     me what I am owed and you will never set eyes on me again.”
    The old bookseller was quite astonished now to hear this young, quiet,
     shy individual—who had worked so conscientiously during the past week—speaking
     in such a way. From the adjoining work rooms, some five heads belonging to
     clerks and shop assistants pressed together, watching and witnessing this scene.
     The old gentleman said: “If I had suspected you of such inclinations, Mr. Simon,
     I would have thought twice before offering you employment in my shop. You appear
     to be quite peculiarly fickle. Since a desk isn’t to your liking, the entire
     enterprise displeases you. From what region of the world do you come, and are
     all the young people there cut from the same cloth? Just look how you are now
     standing before me—the old man. No doubt you don’t yourself know what, in that
     callow head of yours, you actually want. Well, I have no intention of preventing
     you from leaving—here is your money, but in all honesty I must say this gives
     me
     no pleasure.” The bookseller paid him his money, and Simon pocketed it.
    When he arrived at home, he saw his brother’s letter lying on the
     table, he read it and then thought to himself: “He’s a good person, but I’m not
     going to write to him. I don’t know how to describe my circumstances, and they
     aren’t worth describing anyhow. I’ve no cause for complaint, and just as little
     reason to jump for joy, but grounds aplenty to keep silent. It’s quite true,
     the
     things he writes, but for just that reason I shall be satisfied with the
     truth—let’s leave it at that. That he is unhappy is something he himself must
     come to terms with, but I don’t believe he is really so terribly unhappy.
     Letters often come out sounding that way. Writing a letter, you get carried away
     and make incautious remarks. In letters, the soul always wishes to do the
     talking, and generally it makes a fool of itself. So it’s best I don’t write.”
—And with this, the matter was settled. Simon was filled with thoughts,
     with beautiful thoughts. Whenever he was thinking, beautiful thoughts flooded
     his mind quite involuntarily. The next morning—the sun was blindingly bright—he
     reported to the Employment Referral Office. The man who sat there writing got
     to
     his feet. This man knew Simon quite well and was in the habit of addressing him
     with a sort of mocking agreeable familiarity. “Ah, Mr. Simon! Back again? What
     brings you to us today?”
    “I’m looking for a job.”
    “You’ve certainly stopped by here often enough while seeking
     employment, a person might be tempted to think you uncannily swift when it comes
     to job-seeking.” The man laughed, but his laugh was gentle; he was
     incapable of harsh laughter. “What was your last place of employment, if I’m
     allowed to ask?”
    Simon replied: “I was a nurse. I proved to be in possession of all
     those qualities needed for tending the infirm. Why does your jaw drop at my
     admission? Is it so terribly strange for a man my age to try out various
     professions and attempt to