The True Blue Scouts of Sugar Man Swamp by Kathi Appelt Read Free Book Online Page A

honey, “Like I said in my notice, come up with a boatload of cash, and you can stay till the gators come home.” Then he and Jaeger Stitch started laughing, like that was the most hilarious thing they’d ever heard of.
    Chap gripped the handle of the coffeepot. His mother pressed down hard on his shoulder. Say something, he told himself. A man would say something, wouldn’t he? So, in as calm a manner as he could muster, he said, in his lowestvoice, “But what about the woodpecker?”
    That sent Sonny Boy into a paroxysm of laughter. Chap waited, his jaw tightened. His mother kept her hand tight on his shoulder. Finally, Sonny Boy looked at them and tried to collect himself. But in between his guffaws he laid his right palm on the rolled-out paper and added, “That old bird is just like the raven—nevermore.”
    Nevermore? Never more? Chap couldn’t stand it. Without thinking, he blurted out, “Okay. Then, what about the Sugar Man?” Immediately, he knew he had made a mistake. Even though his grandpa had never told him to keep the Sugar Man a secret, Chap understood that it was best not to bring him up. Regret raced across his face.
    But instead of pressing Chap for further information, Sonny Boy and Jaeger thought that was the funniest thing of all.
    â€œLook, kid,” said Sonny Boy, wiping the spit off his mouth and pausing to finish his coffee. Chap waited. Then Sonny Boy delivered his lowest blow yet. “Aren’t you getting a little old for fairy tales?”
    In an instant, Chap’s regret turned back to anger. The fire in his throat grew. He sealed his lips. Otherwise he was sure flames would shoot out. Besides, he didn’t have one other thing to say. Zero. Nada. Zilch.
    Sonny Boy ignored him, then smiled at Chap’s motherand told her again, “If you want to stay here, I’ll need a boatload of cash.”
    Then together, Sonny Boy and Jaeger Stitch gathered up their plans, stood up, and pushed their chairs away from the table. They didn’t do the courteous thing and push them back. They didn’t even wait to eat the pies they had ordered; nor did they offer to pay for them. No, they just walked away. But before Sonny Boy went through the front door, he turned around and said, “Hey, kid. I’ll make you a deal. If I see some proof of the Sugar Man, I’ll give you the whole darned swamp.” Then he burst into laughter again. “Yep,” he said. “Nothing less.” And as a parting shot, he added, “I’ll sign it in blood.”
    Chap watched the door slam. His chest rose and fell. For a full five seconds he stood paralyzed, until at last he rushed onto the porch and watched Sonny Boy and Jaeger climb into their superstretch Hummer. As they backed out, leaving a wide pair of ruts in the red dirt of the parking lot, Chap shouted, “It’s a deal!”
    What he knew: He and his mom had about as much chance of filling a boat with money or finding proof of the Sugar Man as pigs had of flying.

24
    I T ’ S TRUE THAT PIGS CAN ’ T fly, but we’re here to talk about hogs. In 1539 or thereabouts, the conquistador Hernando de Soto (after whom our Information Headquarters is named) sailed from Spain to the New World. In his company of seven ships and two caravels, there were 520 horses and 200 hogs.
    You heard me. Two hundred hunky honkin’ hogs!
    Some of those hogs died at sea. Some of them were gobbled up by the conquistadors. But some, once the boats docked, escaped and formed their own colonies. Those were the first hogs to set foot on American soil.
    It turns out that Hernando de Soto was not a very nice person. He pillaged and looted and generally wreaked mayhem wherever he went. He also wore a heavy suit of metal armor, which, unlike natural fabrics, did not “breathe.” And since he didn’t bathe very often, it’s fair to say that he was rank. Seriously, swamp gas