The Ultimate Guide to Kink by Tristan Taormino Read Free Book Online Page B

landing in the middle on both ass cheeks at once. The tip should not go beyond the meat of the ass. The upper thighs—front, back, and insides—can also be caned. The fold between the butt and thighs is safe but can be painful. Stay away from bony areas, especially the tailbone. Do not hit above the top of the ass crack, because there’s soft tissue there as well as the sciatic nerve. It is best to hit too low rather than too high, but never so low as to hit the backs of the knees.
    When starting a caning session, begin with light taps. Do not use a death grip on the cane. Hold it lightly, so it almost swivels in the hand. As you ramp up the scene, use more wrist action. After a while, you can start using your forearm. Once a bottom is warmed up—and how long that can take is different for everybody—you may be able to do full strokes. Because canes are so flexible, a hard stroke can bend the cane 90 degrees or more. The tip travels very quickly—only a singletail travels faster. Accuracy is crucial: a mis-hit is very painful and can be dangerous. The most common error is wrapping, where the tip of the cane goes beyond the meat of the ass, wraps around the butt, and strikes the side of the hip. Some people don’t have a lot of padding there, but regardless, it is not an erotic spot to hit. Wrapping happens because the top’s body dynamics change when going from a warm-up to a full strike. The tendency is to move your body, the cane, or both farther forward toward the bottom, which can make the cane wrap. Avoid wrapping by compensating and stepping back a little. Beginning caners can also use padding as extra protection for the person being caned. Put your bottom in a long corset or a weight belt or between two pillows; these accessories and the pillows on either side can protect from mis-hits and wrapping.
    When the strike lands, the bottom does not experience the sensation immediately. It takes a while for the sensation to dissipate. The strike lands, there is a little pause, and then the bottom feels it: a hot pain that radiates outward. Timing is key: space out the strokes, or else your partner will go numb and won’t feel anything. Wait about 12–18 seconds, before the pain goes away, and then strike again. I like to ask my partners to tell me when the sensation has gone away. You may be surprised at how long it lasts. You can also watch your partner and wait for him to relax his butt muscles. Again, feedback is so important. Watch her move. Listen to her breathing. Deep, careful breathing is good; short, choppy breathing is not. Strike on the bottom’s exhale. I like to match their breathing and get into a rhythm.
    My favorite way to ascertain how hard the strikes are is to ask partners to rate a hit from 1 to 10. As the scene moves forward, a strike that was rated as a 7 eventually becomes a 3! Vary the strikes. Hit a few medium strikes and then do a heavier one. A snappy blow that is pulled back a bit just before impact will sting more. Follow through past the impact for more thud and penetration. Touch, rub, or caress the butt or genitals between strokes.
    As with spanking, you can add dildos, butt plugs, and vibrators for pleasure. One of my play partners likes to rub himself up against pillows while I am caning him in bed. We get into a rhythm: stroke of the cane, a slight pause, and then he writhes against the pillow slowly. Then he gets back into a position where I can cane him again. It’s very sexy.
    Like rhythmic spanking, rhythmic caning can produce orgasms. Once, during a good caning scene with my girlfriend, I saw her breathing change and her body stiffen, so I backed down. The next day, she told me that if I had kept going, she would have come. I had mistaken her reactions for distress. The next time we played, I watched her and realized that, yes, she was working her way up to an orgasm. I kept up the rhythm and she came.
    Sensuous spanking does not usually incur a lot of bruising, especially