This Charming Man by Marian Keyes Read Free Book Online Page B

held in March. Reception in the K Club.’
    Two thoughts. First one: March a long, long way away. He might change his mind. And second thought: ‘The K Club? Only horsey types have their wedding reception in the K Club. He’s not a horsey type. Is she?’
    Bridie said, ‘Well, she looks like one. A horse, I mean.’
    Bridie, loyal friend.
    ‘But don’t think she is a horsey type, ’ she said.
    I said, ‘Everyone knows it’s not on to hold your wedding reception in the K Club if you’re not a horsey Kildare type.’
    ‘Is tacky,’ Bridie said.
    ‘Yes, is tacky.’
18.37
    Nice little town. Plenty of people about. A lot going on. More than I’d remembered. Hotel, one (small). Pubs, many. Supermarket, one. Boutiques, one. (Awful – Aran ganzies, tweed capes, crocheted bobble hats. Aimed at tourists.) Chipper, one. Surf shops, two! Internet café, one. (Yes, I know . Unexpected.) Huxtery, all-purpose, seaside-town shop, selling Jackie Collins novels, souvenirs and ashtrays shaped like toilets, with writing, ‘Rest Your Weary Ash’ (criminal!), one.
    Decision. Would have my evening meal in a pub. I had no one to talk to, but I had a magazine to hide behind. All pubs advertised food sodecided to choose one at random and take a chance it wasn’t the place we got barred from on Treese’s hen night.
    (Hen nights should be banned. You’re honour-bound to behave atrociously, then feel terribly ashamed afterwards. Didn’t remember much of Treese’s, except that the ten of us – only eight actually, as Treese had passed out in the cottage and never made it to town and Jill was in the pub toilet, collapsed on the floor – draped ourselves all over the barman, pulling at him and saying, ‘Oh baby! You drive me wild!’ And stuff like that. Had a vague memory of the barman begging, ‘Come on now, girls. Cut it out. Is a family pub! Am asking nicely.’ Remember he had seemed on the verge of tears.)
    Opened the door of a place called the Dungeon and a knot of hostile male fizzogs glared up like creatures disturbed under a rock. An impression of red eyes, pointy chins and smell of sulphur. Like the video of ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’. Recoiled.
    Next pub, the Oak, bright lighting, upholstered seating, family groups eating chicken nuggets. Safer. No one glared.
    Took a seat and a barman came over and asked, ‘Have you decided?’
    Realized perhaps he wasn’t Irish – non-Irish accent, toffee-coloured skin, black hair and eyes like raisins (actually that makes them sound small and shrivelled, which was not the case at all. Big dark eyes. If looking for comparison to dried fruit, the best description was, eyes like prunes. But could not say that as prunes had unfortunate connotations, putting everyone in mind of old folk in homes, getting stewed prunes and custard to keep them ‘regular’. However, once I had thought it, couldn’t stop thinking of him as Prune Eyes. Ol’ Prune Eyes, even.)
    Asked him, ‘What’s soup of the day?’
    ‘Mushroom.’
    ‘Is it lumpy?’
    ‘No.’
    ‘Okay. And a glass of red wine.’
    ‘Merlot?’
    ‘Grand.’
20.25
    Finished my dinner. (After the soup of the day, had had the cheesecake of the day – strawberry.) I was standing outside the Oak, wondering what to do next.
    I could go for walk. It was a beautiful bright evening and there was a lovely beach down there. I could blow away the cobwebs, as people might say. (Actually don’t like that saying. Makes me think of spiders. Will not say it again.) Or I could get a DVD. Yes, I decided. Would get a DVD.
20.29
    Supermarket
Wide choice of DVDs. Boy and girl behind the counter (name badges: Kelly and Brandon) tried to help me.
    ‘ Wedding Crashers is good,’ Kelly said. Quite a stout girl. Looked like she enjoyed chips. (Indeed, who doesn’t?) Poker-straight, stripey blonde hair. Pink trackie bottoms pulled very low. Two inches of belly rolling over waistband. Gold bar through belly button, acrylic French manicure. Tacky, yet