to get back to sleep. I couldn’t believe I was slipping out to buy a pregnancy test at five in the morning. What the hell did that say about me? But it had to be done. Just as soon as I dug out a baseball cap and sunglasses. Shit!
○●○●○●○●○
Positive. Positive. Positive. Oh, God oh God ohGod… I very nearly threw up all over again as I stared down at the little blue lines on the little white stick.
My stomach churned and my head spun. Panic welled up in my throat and made me want to scream, or cry, or both. Stupid! Why am I so stupid! How could I let this happen?! The stick shook in my hand. I have to hide it . I rinsed it off and shoved it in my purse, along with the packaging. No one can know . I rushed back into my bedroom before anyone else woke up.
But I had to talk to someone or I’d lose my mind. There was only one person who would understand. “I’m freaking out,” I typed, and sent the message to Patrick. I followed it up with, “I’m pretty sure I’m pregnant.”
He replied right away, like he usually did. “Stay calm. Make a doctor’s appointment. Meet tonight?”
“Yes, please,” I replied back.
My panic finally quieted into a dull dread once we set a time and place. Patrick would know what to do - or he’d at least calm me down so I’d be able to think clearly about what to do next. No rash decisions , I told myself. I took a deep breath.
Voices emerged from the living room. The guys were up, though I didn’t know what Lockett was doing out of bed. He’d better be using his crutches.
I emerged to find him seated on the couch. One crutch was in front of him. Better than nothing .
“I can’t believe it, man,” Mallet said, shaking his head. His face was drawn. “Who the fuck does something like that?”
“What’s going on?” I asked.
“I told him what the doctors said,” Lockett said quietly. “That I won’t ever walk right.” His jaw tensed and his fists tightened at what he left unspoken. His fighting career is over .
“We’ll find the two assholes who got away with this,” Mallet said, his mouth downturned with an unfamiliar darkness.
“Find them and do what?” I asked softly.
His eyes flashed. “Return the favor.”
“Attack them?” I asked, my jaw dropping. Lockett looked away from me, his expression as grim as Mal’s. “You guys… if you find them, you should tell the police. You can’t possibly think that getting revenge will be a good idea.”
Mal spread his hands before him. “This can’t stay unanswered. They took everything from him. He’s your boyfriend, for fuck’s sake, you should be on our side, here.”
“And? What would Alexa say?” His mouth tightened. “Please don’t do anything crazy.”
“It’s not like I can get around, anyway,” Lockett grumbled, “What am I gonna do, beat them with my crutches?”
“If you have to,” Mal said. “You won’t be in that cast forever. As soon as you’ve got the boot…”
“I can’t believe you’re serious,” I said, putting my head in my hands.
They were both silent. I wasn’t going to be able to convince them. Maybe they’d cool off with a little time, or maybe the cops would get to those men first. At that moment, I couldn’t let myself get caught up in it. I had problems of my own.
○●○●○●○●○
I made sure Lockett was comfortable that afternoon before I left. I made him snacks and sandwiches and left them on the coffee table within reach. He accused me of mothering him but I didn’t mind.
“Isn’t that what girlfriends are for?” I asked, flinching when I said “girlfriend.”
He smirked. “Yeah. I guess I can let you do your job.”
I should have been elated but I was awash with guilt. I was his girlfriend - but I was a terrible one. Confirm with a doctor first. No need to worry him before then .
My meeting with
Clive Cussler, Paul Kemprecos