giggled, so happy to hear his voice.
“You need friends, Abby. What about that guy…Tim or Tanner…?”
“Tyler. Yeah, we’re friends, I guess. He’s nice.”
“You’re just friends though, right?” he asked.
“Yeah, what else?”
“Um, Abby, did you read the book I left for you?”
“Oh, the book. I was so worried about…I mean, I forgot. I’ll read it. I promise.”
“You were worried about what? Is Nancy or Joe…?”
“No, they’re never home. I was worried about you.”
“Well, now you can call or text me anytime you want. If you want me to call you back, just text me, and I promise I’ll call you back as soon as I can. I better go, Brianna’s done burning dinner,” he laughed.
“Hey, I heard that!” she yelled from the background.
“Okay. I um…I just… okay, I’ll talk to you…later.”
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
“Nothing.”
“Oh no, what were you going to say?”
“I just miss you, that’s all.” I wanted to tell him I loved him, but was too embarrassed. Of course he knew that I loved him, but as the years had gone by, my feelings for him had changed. I didn’t quite understand my feelings for him, but I knew they were stronger than just friendship. And, it wasn’t the love one felt for a sibling, either.
“I miss you, too. I’ll talk to you soon.”
He hung up and started his new, exciting life while I looked around at my old dingy room and sighed, missing him more than I did before I talked to him. I wasn’t jealous of his happiness; I just wanted to share it with him.
I looked over at my dresser and saw the wrapped package. I stood up and grabbed the book and un-wrapped it and sat down on my bed to read through it. I had no idea what book it was, but I had made a promise to Kellan to read it and I realized there was no time like the present.
I looked at the cover and read the title out loud, Facts of Life for the Teenage Girl . “Guess he’s right, it certainly doesn’t sound like a mystery novel.” I said to myself. I opened the book and skimmed through it quickly. I found myself stopping on certain pictures and even though I was alone, I found myself blushing in my solitary room. I wondered why Kellan wanted me to read this, and I wanted to close it and put it away, but I had promised him I would read it, so I turned it back to the first page and started reading…
Once I started reading the book, I found that I couldn’t stop. I read and studied each page. I read about how both girls and boys develop over time. I read about periods and I finally understood why women had them…it made sense. But, when I got to the parts about love and sex, and the pictures of what men and women did together when they were in love, I shut the book. I remembered that Brianna said she loved Kellan, and as I looked at the pictures of the couple in the book, I saw them , and knew without a doubt that they were probably doing…that. I dropped the book on my bed and stood up. I felt sick, and I didn’t know why. All I knew was that I didn’t want Brianna anywhere near Kellan, but there was nothing I could do about it, and suddenly I found myself throwing the book onto the floor and throwing myself down on the bed, and I cried…
After about 20 minutes of non-stop tears, Nancy came into my room…without knocking.
“What are you doing?” she asked.
“Nothing,” I sniffled.
“Are you crying?” she asked, sounding concerned, which was unlike her.
“No. I’m fine,” I snapped, turning away from her. “What do you want?” I asked.
“Your social worker dropped by to see you, a surprise visit. Put on the new clothes ‘what’s his name’ bought you and for the love of God, stop crying!” she whispered in an angry snarl.
“His name is KELLAN!” I shouted, standing up to face her.
“I don’t have time to argue with you, just get ready,” she said and then focused on my book on the floor. “What the hell’s