Uncovering You 6: Deliverance by Scarlett Edwards Read Free Book Online

me. It feels like a deeply palpable thing, swinging from Jeremy to me like a pendulum. The gravity and weight of our conversation makes it all the more powerful.
    I lower my eyes. For some reason, memories of last night’s sex flash through my mind. Was that the tipping point for him? Was that when the pieces finally clicked in his head?
    “You cannot love me,” I say, staring at a spot between us on the floor. “Otherwise, why would you do all those things to me?”
    A hiss escapes Jeremy’s lips. He stands up violently and turns away.
    I keep my eyes on that one, single spot. All I see of Jeremy are his legs, flashing in front of me. Back and forth he goes, his strides long and angry.
    “I cannot love you,” he repeats. “I cannot love you. Is that what you truly think Lilly, or is that some defense mechanism kicking in? I cannot love you. Ha! Who are you to tell me what I can and cannot do? Who are you to try to deny the truth I’ve shared with you?”
    “Jeremy. Please,” I say softly. “Don’t get angry again. You took it the wrong way. That’s not what I meant—“
    “No?” his baritone voice smashes through my protest like a battering ram. “I think that’s exactly what you meant, Lilly. And I think that you are scared of the truth. You asked me why it was you at the start? That I can answer. But I still will not. You ask me why it’s you , really you , who has stolen my heart? That I will never know.”
    “I cannot love you,” he rages on. “Do you even know what love is, Lilly-flower? Have you ever been in the clutches of its throes? You’re young, yes. That is only a small part of what draws me to you. You want to know the other parts? I’ll list them. It’s your courage. Your strength. Your resolve and resilience. Your brilliant mind.
    “If those are not reasons enough to make you question your only disbelief, consider this: I know everything there is to know about you. I know that your mother’s maiden name is Barrs. I know that she was married once before she had you. Did you know that, Lilly? Did she ever tell you the truth?”
    “You’re lying,” I say.
    “No. No, my dear. This time, I’m not. The only lie I am guilty of presenting to you is a lie of omission. But I told you what it was earlier. That was the last secret. The final mistruth. It ate at me these past weeks. Now it’s there, out in the open, and you know as much as I do. You know how fucked up I am. You’ve seen it all, Lilly, every side of me. Sides that have long lain hidden, sides I did not know I still possessed. You made me feel worry. True, gut-wrenching worry when you nearly drowned a week ago.
    “So yes. I broke my own rules. I broke them once , Lilly, and I shocked you even when you were still under the time limit. That is the type of man that I am. That is the type of man who loves you.
    “Have you ever been loved, Lilly? Truly, deeply, impossibly loved? I know you now have poor relations with your mother. A pity, that. Before you, my mother was the most important woman in my life. That was the only true relationship that I have had with a woman without any underlying, secretive need.
    “I told you about the other woman. The one who almost ruined me. The one whom I risked all to let in.
    “It was a disaster. It made me vow never to be so reckless again. But with you . . . with you, Lilly, that fear does not hold me back any longer.”
    He stops directly in front of me. I can see the toes of his shoes at the very top of my vision.
    “So don’t you dare tell me that I cannot love you, Lilly,” he rages. “You, who have seen so little of the world. How many schools have you attended growing up? Can you even remember at all? Well?” His voice rises. “How many?”
    “I… I don’t know,” I say. He’s not yelling. But it’s the closest thing to it.
    “It wasn’t a rhetorical questions, Lilly,” he snarls. He swoops down and forces my chin up. “List them!”
    His intensity is frightening me