Underneath It All by Erica Mena Read Free Book Online

memorial I couldn’t breathe. I felt like I was in a sauna and at any minute I was going to suffocate. I sat in the front row amongst his family and it was crazy that some of these people actually knew who I was yet had never met me before. Trent had been open with expressing his feelings for me and he had even told his family who I was.
                  I always knew that Trent did whatever he could to help his grandmother but I didn’t know the extent or the impact that he had on their lives until I saw it written all over their faces. I knew his family had it hard yet at the same time I think they found strength in each other and that no matter what they went through, no matter how hard things got for them, they would always be okay because they had one another to lean on.
                  I would have to find that same strength and keep going because I felt like I owed it to Trent. I needed to be strong and show him that I could keep fighting regardless of what was being thrown at me and despite his absence I could carry on by myself, I had to. Yes, he had always been the one to push me and encourage me but now he would be doing so from a different place and no matter how much it hurt, I had to accept that.
                  Trent’s death was the end of my going to school. I dropped out in the eleventh grade because I could no longer be in a place that he had been. I could no longer walk down the halls, sit in a classroom, or eat in a cafeteria that he had been in. Everything reminded me of him and while I didn’t want to forget, it was also much too painful to remember.
                  The only thing I had left was my work so that’s what I did. I had to keep going whether he was alive or not because I felt like I owed it to him to continue and to live my life to the fullest since his was taken so soon and so unexpectedly.
                  Shortly after Trent’s death my mother and Brian split up. I don’t really know what happened; I think it was a combination of things and that ultimately they just grew apart. In the span of a year I had lost the three most important men in my life at that time and I think that’s what influenced me to finally leave home.

Chapter Six
                  Six
    months after the Young Gunz gig and Trent’s passing, I got a call from the same director asking me to be in a video for Nina Sky but this time I would be the feature girl. I was used to being an extra in a party scene or standing next to the lead girl but I never actually got to be her. This was my chance.
                  After sitting still for so long in hair and makeup I was ready to go home. I was trying to think of an excuse to tell the crew that would be believable enough for me to go home but right when I had figured it out I was called to set.
                  Fat Joe was sitting on a couch surrounded by three women and not too far from him was his wife seated in a director’s chair. I stared at her for what seemed like an eternity and I’m glad she didn’t catch me because I’m sure I looked like a creep. She’s a short, curvy, extremely attractive Columbian woman with pearly white teeth. She was wearing these jeans with a pearl chain hanging from the side of them with a white fur and her hair was in a smooth ponytail straight to the back.
                  I couldn’t help but notice another man that was standing next to Joe and they kind of resembled a little but he was much smaller. He was wearing a black leather jacket with an embroidered design of the New York City skyline, dark blue jeans, fresh wheat Timberlands, a black tee and a Terror Squad chain. Once I noticed he was staring at me I quickly turned my head and looked the other way. I tried to pay attention to the PA who was telling me where to stand but soon enough the man who had been staring at me approached me and was right beside