Unraveled by Dani Matthews Read Free Book Online Page B

our relationship. I hate that
this is what we've been left with.
    Noah crosses
his arms and studies me as he stands before me. “Does Cole know? He must if you
two are having sex.” His expression is calm but I can see the tightness around
his eyes and mouth.
    My mouth
opens to tell him it's none of his business but I already know that'll be the
equivalent of beating my head against a brick wall. Noah is determined to have
this out and I have a feeling he'd be haunting my every move until I began to
answer his questions. “Yes,” I say.
    “And what
does he think of what you do?”
    I glower at
him. “It's my life, not his.”
    “I asked
what he thinks ,” he says with irritation.
    “He accepts
me as I am.”
    “In other
words, he doesn't care because it doesn't get in the way of what he wants,” he
says with barely concealed disgust.
    “Maybe he
just knows when to step back instead of pushing.”
    “If he's
okay with you mutilating yourself, then clearly he's using you. Nobody in their
right mind would stand back and allow someone they care about to do that to
themself.”
    I flinch at
the word “mutilating.”  It sounds so ugly and my hands clench into fists.
I have a strong desire to walk out on this conversation but I know it's
pointless. If we didn't have it out now, we'd have it out later.
    “Blayre, I
know you don't want to hear this but you need help. I've been doing research on
this and it's obviously turned into an addiction. You can't stop it on your
own, not with as long as you've been at it. And guessing by all your scars,
it's been years at least. You need professional help.”
    The color
drains from my face as I stare at him. The idea of seeing a shrink and allowing
them to poke around in my head frightens me more than prison. “I'm fine. I can
stop any time I want, I just choose not to,” I argue as I struggle to stay
calm. Panicking in front of Noah would get me absolutely nowhere.
    Noah shakes
his head, not looking the slightest bit convinced. “I don't buy that. Answer me
this. Do you do it because in some weird way it helps you deal with whatever
has you upset enough to cut, or is it more of a punishment of some sort?”
    I look away.
    “Or is it
both?” he asks softly.
    I refuse to
answer him.
    He squats
down in front of me. “Look at me, please.”
    Slowly, my
eyes shift to him.
    “Somehow, I
am going to find a way to help you.”
    “Don't
bother.”
    His eyes hold
mine for a minute and then he rises to his feet. “Good night, Blayre,” he says
before he turns and leaves my room.
    I stare
after him for a long time as I try to calm my frantic thoughts. What would
happen now? Would he eventually tell Tate?
***
    Strangely
enough, Noah eased up on his crusade to save me from myself that week and I
remember it passing by in a blur. I have no idea why he backed off, but it was
easy to fall back into old habits. My days were filled with school, drugs and
sex. Being with Cole was the only distraction I had and I clung to it almost
desperately. In the back of my mind I'd known I was beyond any kind of
salvation.
    Even Noah
with all his determination couldn't save me at that point.
    I
couldn't even work up the courage to save myself.
     

  
Anger
A rage has come over her
     
    After school
on Monday, Cole takes me by surprise and asks if we can hang at my house after
school. I'm a little uneasy with the idea but Tate will be gone by four and
Noah is normally at the college until five or later. Once we grab a bite to eat
at a fast food joint, we head back to the house. It's about quarter after four
when I pull up in the driveway and Cole parks his motorcycle at the curb.
    As we head
up the little rock path that leads to the front door, I warn him that when Noah
comes home, we need to leave.
    “What's the
big deal? You can't have your boyfriend over or something when he's around?”
Cole asks as we head inside.
    I sigh
inwardly. It seems like Cole's becoming suspicious of Noah. I don't