Up High in the Trees by Kiara Brinkman Read Free Book Online

looks down at his lap. His hands are folded neatly.
    The doctor tells me to go out to the waiting room. She needs to talk to Dad alone.
    There are Legos out there, she says, and books.
    I stand up and look at Dad. He nods. My chest feels tight and it’s hard to breathe. I can only take little breaths.

    I find things with my new glasses.
    On the sidewalk at the end of our driveway, there’s a dead butterfly getting eaten by ants. I lie down on my stomach to watch. My eyes still hurt, but I can see more now. I can see all the tiny ant legs walking over the butterfly.
    Leo comes with his big, red backpack on.
    What’re you doing? he asks. He stands there and waits for me.
    I can see his feet standing, waiting, but I don’t get up, so he leaves.
    I watch the ants. There are more and more, covering the butterfly and turning it black.
    The sky’s getting dark and the ants are harder to see. I have to squint at them. I feel cold, but I’m stuck. I need to watch until the butterfly is gone.
    Dad comes out to get me. I let him pick me up. He carries me inside like a baby. My face is cold. I reach up and put my hand on Dad’s cheek. I hold my hand there.
    Dad carries me upstairs and takes off my glasses and my shoes. He tucks me into bed with my clothes on.

    Before Mother married Dad, she was a girl who lived in a white house. She had a cat named Duncan and he was the same color white as the house. On the day Duncan died under the bushes in the backyard, Mother found his body and she ran.
    She was running and running to get the cat out of her head. She kept running to make him not dead and then she fell.
    I remember like I was floating there, watching.
    The lady with shiny gray hair helped Mother up. Mother’s hands were stinging and her knees were bloody and hot.
    Oh dear, the lady said.
    Mother was not crying. She was looking at her red, scraped hands and thinking of the cat.
    Let’s clean you up, the lady said.
    Mother followed her into a house. I remember Mother walked with her hands in front of her, palms turned up like she was showing them to the gray sky.
    In a blue bathroom, the lady picked up Mother and sat her next to the sink.
    What’s your name, sweetheart? the lady asked.
    Louise, Mother told her.
    Such a grown-up name, the lady said.
    On the wall, there were two blue fish with gold bubbles floating up out of their mouths. The lady cleaned Mother’s hands and knees with a clear bottle of alcohol that she poured on cotton balls. The alcohol burned, but Mother didn’t cry.

    I pretend to be asleep still when Cass comes in to wake me up for school. She sits on the edge of my bed.
    Sebby, she says, it’s late.
    I don’t open my eyes.
    I know you can hear me, Cass says and she stands up now.
    Her slippers swish-walk away on the carpet. Then I wet the bed on purpose. I didn’t think I would really do it, but then I do and I feel bad.
    Cass, I say, I had an accident.
    She walks over to me and lifts my blanket to see.
    Are you kidding me? she asks. We don’t have time for this.
    I’m sorry, I say.
    Cass grabs my shoulders and pulls me out of the bed.
    Go take a shower, she says. This is so gross.
    I watch Cass peel the wet sheet off my bed. She turns around and sees me watching.
    Go, she says.
    I run into the bathroom and turn on the shower. Then I take off my T-shirt. My wet pajama bottoms are stuck to my legs. I pull them down and get in the shower. I stand there under the hot water with my eyes closed. I am really sorry. Now Cass will be mean and I don’t want to go to school.
    There’s knocking.
    Sebby, Dad’s voice says, we’re late already, let’s go.
    I don’t move. Dad knocks again.
    Sebby, he says, are you okay?
    I open my eyes now. Dad knocks and then comes in. He turns off the water and wraps a towel around me.
    Did you hear me? he asks.
    I don’t say anything.
    You have to hurry, Dad says and carries me into my room. Get