VAIN - Part Three (The VAIN Series Book 3) by Deborah Bladon Read Free Book Online

mostly interested in men for sex."
    He cocks a brow as the corner of his mouth twitches. "You fucked around?"
    "I did." Why try and hide the fact that I used to be that girl? I was the one who would hook up with a man just because I needed to feel that rush of pleasure. "I was safe and sane about it." I close my eyes to ward off the many faces of the men I've randomly fucked over the years. "I didn't want anything serious."
    "Do you think you ran to Paris to escape that?" It's a serious question that requires an honest answer.
    "Sadie fell in love with her husband around that time." I cringe inwardly thinking about how I felt knowing my best friend had fallen into the lap of the man of her dreams, while I was jumping from bed-to-bed searching for anything that could satiate my needs that day. "I saw how happy she was. I wanted that too."
    "You moved all the way to Paris to get that?" His fingers trace a path around each of my toes.
    "I moved to Paris so I could be with myself." I've never confessed this to anyone, not even Sadie. "I didn't like who I was. I was always searching for the next party or club to go to. I couldn’t be alone with myself for more than a few hours."
    "Why?" I see the genuine concern in his eyes.
    "I wanted to be a girl that men fell in love with too." It's a direct confession that leaves me wide open and vulnerable. "I wanted a man to stay with me beyond one night."
    "Alexa," he whispers my name as he crawls up the bed. "How could any man not want to be with you forever?"
    I sigh heavily. "I would give my number to men after we'd hooked up." I pull my gaze from his, embarrassed by the words about to leave my lips. "They wouldn’t call."
    "What?" He jumps back onto his knees so he's facing me directly. "What the fuck was wrong with them?"
    I laugh at the animated tone in his voice. "They knew I'd put out. They got what they wanted." Honesty is the best policy, right? It had taken me weeks after leaving Boston for Paris before I realized any of this. The time I'd spent alone there, pre-Beck was a period of gentle awakening for me. I'd cried for hours thinking about where my life was. I'd planned for days on where I wanted to be in a year, in five years and in ten years.
    "How did Brighton enter the picture?" I knew the question was coming. It was settled, simmering on the back burner, waiting for the moment when it would need Noah's full attention again.
    I look into his eyes. I need him to fully understand the bare honesty that is woven into my words. "He saved me when I was lost." The words carry a double meaning.
    "You told me months ago that you shared a mutual friend?"
    "It's the man who owns the restaurants." I push my leg closer to Noah, longing for his continued soft touch. "He's Sadie's husband."
    Noah massages the sole of my foot. His strong hands deftly push into the skin, pulling out the stress and pain that has settled there after all the long nights I've spent on my feet at the restaurant lately. "They connected you with Brighton?"
    "I was lost one day and they had given me his number." I push back the memory of that day and the first glimpse I had of Brighton's face. "He helped me find my way out of the maze that is the streets of Paris." I smile softly. "We went for a coffee and talked for hours."
    "You fell fast for him?"
    "Very," I say, not looking at him. "We bonded quickly."
    "You didn't know about his girlfriend?" A brief glimpse of something skirts across his gaze. "About Liz?"
    "Sadie told me he had gone there to help her after an accident." I continue," I asked him about her that first day. It was while we were drinking our coffee. He told me they weren't together anymore. He said that he was there working and helping her if she needed him."
    He studies my profile. I can feel his eyes boring into me. "You believed him?"
    "Why wouldn't I?" I spit back, trying not to sound as defensive as I feel. I've questioned myself endlessly about my decision to put that much faith in