Wag the Dog by Larry Beinhart Read Free Book Online

necessary speculation, private versus public, had been breached. The military, for example, spent a lot of time producing “what if” scenarios. What do we do if “there is a Russian counter-counterrevolution and they launch missiles at Moldova, Ukraine, and Berlin”? If “there is violent civil unrest in the United States”? If “China goes to war with Japan”? Anyone with a grain of sense would consider that to be sensible speculation so that when the unthinkable does happen there is some sort of plan. But no! When one of those papers was leaked by some assholeliberal do-goodie, the media reacted as if the president was personally planning to open concentration camps to detain everyone who hadn’t voted for Richard Nixon back in 1968. When a man in power told a dirty joke or stuck his dick in the box of some foxy Pandora or expressed his exasperation with some person or group in ethnic terms, that was material that could destroy a career, even an entire regime. Especially if the other side had a Lee Atwater who knew how to use it. This memo, or whatever it should be called, was pure madness. To admit that anyone in this administration had ever even had the thoughts that Atwater had written down would destroy them all.
    Nevertheless, James Baker did not burn it, or tear it into tiny pieces and eat them, or head for the nearest shredder. He put the memo in his pocket. And kept it.
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    6 Maureen Dowd and Thomas Friedman, The Fabulous Bush & Baker Boys, New York Times Magazine, 5/6/90.

Chapter
F IVE

    M AGGIE LIVES ON the beach. In Trancas, just up from Malibu. I live in Sherman Oaks. They’re both in America. That’s a joke.
    I got a visual for you. Me in my three rooms—bedroom, bathroom, and the room that’s everything else—packing. Two large suitcases. Because I’m moving to Maggie’s. I don’t know what exactly I’m in for, so I overpack. I hesitate over the guns. But for the same reason I pack my good suit and my swimming trunks, I take the Glock 17 with a shoulder holster, a Star 9-mm with an ankle holster and the little Beretta 92 that I can fit into a holster at the small of my back. All of them take 9-mm ammunition.
    I take my fiber-case kits. The company recommends that we bring them on assignment whenever possible. There are three standard kits. The DS—defense system—includes: the CMS-3, which detects RF bugs, carrier current, transmitters; the DL-1000, that’s a hand-held, take-anywhere bug detector, a hand-held weapons detector, telephone-line tracing set; and a telephone scrambler. Kit 2 contains more active systems, “for those times when it’s time to do it to them before they do it to you.” An EAR-200—you can listen through walls; a long-distance parabolic microphone; a vehicle-tracking device. Computer software to block access to your PC. A remote car starter—for the truly security-conscious; hey, there are people who need them, believe me. A Minox infrared camera with infrared flash; miniature microphones,transmitters, and recorders. The third kit has a stun gun, a stun baton, body armor briefcase inserts, and various mace systems.
    All this equipment impresses clients. That’s what the company marketing trainers tell us and in my experience it’s true. The kind of people who hire us are the kind of people who buy Mercedes and Porsches—they like the bells and whistles. Also, the equipment is a money-maker. Anything you use, you charge for. “You want me to check your phone lines, sir?” You take out a $3,000 CMS-3 and bill $150 an hour or part thereof for the use of it. They understand. You can also sell them the equipment. It’s like the Honda commercial—“the car that sells itself.” These are toys that people are longing for. Don’t you want to listen through walls? Hear what they’re saying when you leave the room? Know what your wife