War on Whimsy by Liane Moriarty Read Free Book Online

Tyler, from the sofa next to Nicola.
    Nicola moved her hand away. “Of course not.”
    â€œI see the volcanoes!” said Sean.
    Nicola looked out and saw explosions of fiery red on the planet below. She could also see the tiny Planet of Whimsy with its halo of pink dust attached to Volcomania by the long tube that Nicola knew was an Underground Sea. She shivered as she imagined scuba diving through it. She liked swimming but she didn’t particularly like diving underwater for too long. Of course, it wasn’t like she’d have to hold her breath the whole time, but still.
    As the spaceship got closer to Volcomania, they got a clearer view of the volcanoes and the red molten lava exploding from each one, like rows of bubbling cooking pots. Nicola imagined how just one drop would sear her skin. She took out her lava screen and began to reapply a fresh new layer. She saw the rest of the Space Brigade doing the same.
    â€œA little harder, please,” said the princess sleepily, to the poor servant who was rubbing her feet. Apparently, the president’s family lived in a specially constructed Lava Protection Bubble so she didn’t have to worry about applying lava cream.
    â€œCan the Space Brigade please assemble at Exit Door Five Hundred and prepare for drop-off,” said a polite voice over a loudspeaker.
    Nicola’s heart jumped like a crazy gymnast. She packed her lava screen into her satchel and stood up, wondering if her own face looked as terrified as the others. They were all adjusting their parachutes with trembling fingers.
    â€œShouldn’t we have had some training before suddenly jumping out of a spaceship wearing a parachute?” said Greta to Nicola, as if Nicola had any control over the situation.
    â€œParachuting is easy !” Princess Petronella sat up so abruptly her foot-rubbing servant toppled backward onto the floor. “I once spent a delightful week parachuting on the Planet of Bliss.”
    â€œDid you have any training?” asked Katie, helping the servant back to her feet.
    â€œOf course! I spent a month working with my own personal parachute trainer,” said the princess. “He had me land on a specially built soft surface until I got my technique right. He said I would have broken my legs otherwise.” She laughed merrily. “Ah, good times.”
    The Space Brigade looked at her with stony faces.
    â€œOh,” said the princess. “Well, I’m sure you’ll all be fine. Just remember to bend your legs when you land.”
    â€œSpace Brigade report to Exit Door Five Hundred right NOW!” said a rather less polite voice over the loudspeaker.
    â€œHave fun,” said the princess, lying back down and presenting her feet to the servant. “Please don’t worry about me, stuck with the boring toad. I’ll manage. Royals are used to making sacrifices.”
    â€œIs she for real ?” said Sean, as the Space Brigade ran down the corridor along the side of the spaceship.
    Nicola was busy looking at the numbers on the exit doors. “Oh, no—that’s only Exit Door Twenty! We’re so far away!”
    They all picked up the pace, their parachutes bouncing on their backs.
    â€œAre you all deaf? Space Brigade to Exit Door Five Hundred!” said the loudspeaker voice.
    â€œWe’re coming !” called Nicola.
    The corridor seemed endless. It was like something out of a nightmare. By the time they got to Exit Door Five Hundred, they’d all be so exhausted they’d just fall out.
    With her longer legs, Shimlara was the fastest. She ran ahead of them, calling out the numbers on the doors.
    Finally, she shouted triumphantly, “Exit Door Five Hundred!”
    The rest of the Space Brigade ran up behind her, their faces red and sweaty, their chests heaving.
    Exit Door Five Hundred was wide open and the heat and noise from the erupting volcanoes below struck them like a brutal slap across the