MANOR!
The most coveted houseguests have arrived at Faded Glory Manor, and not a moment too soon!
The moneyed Sterling twins are in a bit of a pickle: Their mounds of cash are tied up due to their deceased father’s strict rules on their inheritance. With three months until their eighteenth birthday, and no relatives tospeak of, Richard and Richina Sterling have no choice but to hole up in Faded Glory Manor, home of their late father’s wartime comrade, Lord Worthless.
But Faded Glory Manor is not quite the lap of luxury the Sterling twins have come to expect. The drafty old home once knew greatness, but can barely afford a maid for each lady of the house these days! Fallen on hard times, indeed.
The twins were in for a rude awakening the moment they arrive.
The entire staff was assembled inside to greet them, watching as Richie leapt over the side of the car, heels clicking together, and gold coins dropping from his pocket. He saw them but couldn’t be bothered to pick them up as he hurried to open Richina’s door. “It’s definitely the right address. This is Faded Glory Manor,Sister dear,” he said. “It certainly has seen better days, but we’ve been invited to stay and it would be poor form not to, so let’s make the best of it, shall we?”
Richina extended a hand dripping in diamond rings and bracelets. “If you insist.”
“Don’t worry,” Richie assured her. “I’ll have a tennis court installed over the weekend.”
At the twenty-foot-high front door, Richie banged on the enormous brass knocker and the twins were instantly engulfed in a swirling dust storm. “It seems no one has been here for a while,” Richie observed while Richina coughed spasmodically against the door. She was nearly toppled as, with a deafening creak, the door opened.
A skeleton in filthy butler attire greeted them. “We’ve been expecting you.”
Exchanging a dubious and wary look, the twins followed him into the rotted and decaying hall, a spectacle of past glory in desperate need of upkeep. A sad-looking maid and seemingly senile valet stood in the hall. “This can’t be the entire staff!” stage-whispered Richina to her equally horrified brother. Richina wiped the grime from her forehead, setting off another deafening clatter of jewelry.
A woman’s voice trilled from the dayroom. “Diamonds? Do I hear diamonds?” The lady of the estate, Lady Worthless, stumbled out, intoxicated by the sound. “I once had diamonds. Where is that beautiful music coming from?”
“Do you mean these?” Richina asked and shimmied with arms outstretched, her many diamonds, bracelets, necklaces, and brooches creating such a commotion that a largechunk of plaster falls from the ceiling.
Alerted by the sound of the rattling diamonds, Lord Worthless walked in. Stepping over the hunk of fallen plaster, he shook Richie Sterling’s hand. “How do you do?” he asked.
“We’re not quite sure,” Richie admitted, eyeing the plaster under the Lord’s feet. “Do things like this often happen here?”
“Things like what?” Lord Worthless inquired.
“That plaster on the floor,” Richie said, pointing.
“I say, I don’t have the foggiest idea what you mean,” Lord Worthless said, his expression vague. “Have you met my daughters yet?”
“I’m here, father.” The twins heard the voice but saw no one.
“Stop fooling, Doodles, and show yourself,” Lord Worthless demanded.
“But I’m right here,” Doodles Worthless insisted.
Lord Worthless turned to his wife for help but she had become completely bedazzled by Richina’s jewelry and could only stare at it, her eyes two saucers of yearning. He clapped his hands sharply. “Come off it!” he demanded. “Why can’t we see Doodles?”
Lady Worthless roused from her dazed state. “Doodles? Oh, she must have blended in with the wallpaper again.” She smiled apologetically at Richie and Richina as
Learning to Kill: Stories