his thoughts, Justin hadn’t noticed Sean emerge from the shop. Laden down with carrier bags, he grinned at Justin, but there was uncertainty there and he still looked sheepish.
“Hey. What do you want to do for dinner? We could cook back at mine, but it’s pretty late already. Would you rather eat out?”
A little crease appeared between Sean’s brows as he considered this. Then he said, “I think I’m done with the crowds. How about we grab a takeaway from M&S and heat it up at your place.”
“Yeah. That sounds good.”
The awkwardness between them eased as they wandered the aisles, debating what food to get. Justin wanted Chinese, but Sean said he couldn’t face another noodle for at least a month. So they ended up getting pizzas instead, with garlic bread because Justin said Sean needed feeding up, and salad because Justin was—according to Sean—a weird health freak.
“The tomato sauce on the pizza doesn’t count as one of your five a day,” Justin insisted.
“Well it should, and it’s got mushrooms on it too.”
“There’s about one mushroom on the whole damn pizza. That doesn’t count either.”
Sean rolled his eyes. “Okay, okay. Get the salad. But I hate eating salad in winter. It’s too cold.”
Justin chuckled. “We sound like an old married couple. I think we’re taking this pretend relationship thing a little far, bickering over our grocery shopping.”
Sean smiled, and the warmth in it made Justin’s stomach flip. “More practice for tomorrow?”
“Yeah. Nothing like a good domestic to make us look authentic.” Justin picked up the bag of salad and put it in the basket he held over one arm. Feeling bold, he took Sean’s hand and laced their fingers together. “Is this okay?”
Sean licked his lips and then nodded, a brief jerk of his head. “Sure. I need to get used to touching you before tomorrow, otherwise I’ll forget I’m allowed.” His palm was warm and his fingers strong when he squeezed Justin’s.
The weirdest thing was how it didn’t feel weird at all.
Sean kept hold of Justin’s hand all the way to the checkout, only letting go when they needed to load their shopping onto the belt.
They didn’t hold hands in the street, but they walked close, elbows bumping. Then, on the Tube, they sat with their thighs pressed together. Normally Justin would have tried to put a little space between them, but today he didn’t bother. He let himself enjoy the feeling of Sean’s leg next to his own and allowed his imagination to run away with a little fantasy about them really being a couple. They were heading home to the flat they shared, ready to eat dinner and then make out on the sofa—
“Isn’t this your stop?” Sean nudged Justin and ripped him abruptly from thoughts of being back on his knees in front of Sean again, like earlier but with fewer clothes and more blowjobs.
“Oh bollocks, yes.”
They made it off the train just in time.
CHAPTER FIVE
“Hurry up!” Justin banged on the door of his bathroom. They were getting ready to go out to the party and Sean had been in there for ages. “What the fuck are you doing in there? Oh my God. I bet you’re wanking in the shower. If you use all the hot water, I’m gonna kill you.”
He paced around his bedroom as he waited for Sean to get the hell out so he could have his turn in the bathroom. He’d already laid his clothes out. There was nothing else he could do until he’d showered and washed his hair, and he was way too jittery to sit and chill. The thought of seeing Andy with his new bloke was making him nauseous. Even if he didn’t want Andy back, Justin wasn’t looking forward to coming face-to-face with his replacement. What did this new guy have that Justin didn’t, other than novelty value? Maybe that was all it was. But deep down, Justin couldn’t help feeling that he must have done something wrong. Maybe he wasn’t good enough in bed, or attractive enough, or