What If... All Your Friends Turned On You by Liz Ruckdeschel Read Free Book Online

exasperated. Even Haley knew Shaun well enough by now to know that “Eiggib on” was backwards for “No biggie.” Shaunliked to talk backwards occasionally. It was one of his quirks. “Darcy never comes out and says she wants to be with Devon. She’s always got some phony reason she has to be near him. It’s totally manipulative. And it’s working. Devon’s at the point now that whenever we ask him to do something his first response is ‘Sure, I’ll see if Darcy can come.’ And you think I like hanging out with that little pervy twerp?”
    â€œThis is worse than I thought.” Haley put down her sandwich. She’d been feeling kind of territorial toward Devon in the past few days, thinking she should be the one cooing over veggie dumplings with him, not Darcy Podowski. But she’d always figured that sooner or later, he’d get tired of Darcy’s tricks and come to his senses. Lately, though, it was abundantly clear that Darcy was actually getting to Devon; she was a real threat, and it was time for Haley to quit fooling around and step up to the challenge.
    â€œTake my advice, Haley,” Irene said. “Make an effort here, or you’ll lose Devon to Darcy for good. And nobody wants to see that happen. Certainly not me and Shaun.”
    â€œSpeak for yourself, woman. I dig the pervy twerp.” Irene punched him in the shoulder. “Okay, fine, you want to worm your way into their little mud hut and cool down whatever’s been heating up between ’em, I get it.” Haley and Irene stared atShaun, surprised. “What? I listen, I pay attention. I can scheme with the best of them. I happen to think it’s a huge waste of milliseconds, but …”
    â€œShaun the love guru,” Irene said.
    â€œNo, no, maybe he’s right,” Haley said. “You know, keep your friends close, and keep your enemies—”
    â€œOn a choke leash chained to the garage,” Shaun interrupted. “That’s right.”
    â€œYou aren’t seriously thinking of listening to him, are you?” Irene asked.
    â€œWhat else am I supposed to do? Devon and Darcy are probably doing it as we speak.”
    â€œIf that’s the case, they got one interesting mating dance,” Shaun said. “They’re coming this way. Ti t’nsi, ecnedicnioc ynnuf a s’taht?”
    â€œIt’s a small town, Shaun,” Haley said.
    â€œToo small,” Irene added.
    Devon and Darcy strolled into the diner and waved at Irene, Shaun and Haley. Devon started toward them to say hello, but Darcy grabbed his sleeve and said, “Quick! A booth just opened up!” and dragged him away.
    â€œSee what I mean?” Irene said.
    â€œThat was cold,” Shaun said. “Let a guy say yoyo to his friends, at least, before you give him the cat’s cradle.”
    Haley finished her sandwich, trying not to glancein Devon’s direction. But she didn’t need to look—Shaun was happy to give her the play-by-play.
    â€œDevon started to sit down across from Darcy, but she’s making him sit on the same side as her,” Shaun said. “Here comes the waitress with their water … ooh! Darcy’s pulling the old ‘I spilled water on my T-shirt’ trick. ‘Devon, will you help me wipe it off?’” Shaun put on a girly voice for Darcy’s lines, then switched to a deep boy voice. “‘Sure, Darcy, anything for you….’”
    â€œWe don’t need you to do the voices, Dr. Seduction,” Irene said. “I feel like I’m listening to a puppet show.”
    â€œNow they’re ordering…. Darcy’s saying, ‘I’ll have a big heaping helping of Devon! Mmm … mmm … good.’”
    â€œOkay, Shaun, that’s enough,” Irene said. “Haley, time to make your move. Why don’t you amble on over there and ask the two of them if they