Wild Song by Janis Mackay Read Free Book Online Page A

I tried—’
    But I interrupted. Whatever Hannu needed to tell me, something told me I didn’t want to hear it. Something deep inside. ‘I could find old man Vainamoinen,’ I blurted out. ‘I’ll find Ahtola, and I’ll escape from this hole. I’ll do what I want. Vainamoinen can be my dad. Then I’ll find my seal skin and put it on. Then, whooo, off I go, under the waves.’
    Hannu smiled. Maybe he forgot whatever it was he was going to tell me. ‘Hey!’ he said. ‘So you like my stories, huh? Thought you said they were rubbish too, like the island.’
    I shrugged and shoved a huge strawberry into my mouth. Then I suddenly lunged at Hannu as though I was going to punch him. Hannu drew back, then laughed as I did,but I knew I’d scared him. ‘Or maybe,’ I said, doing a funny dance around the table, ‘I’ll find pirates and live with them. Sail the seven seas and all that. That’s the kind of life I want. Always going places. Never hanging around. Nobody telling you what to do.’
    ‘And wearing a black patch over your eye?’ Hannu winked at me. ‘Drifting with the tides. Drinking rum, and pretty girls in every port. That’s the life.’ He pulled the top from a strawberry and lifted the bright red berry into the air. ‘My girlfriend likes these …’ His voice trailed off and he started whistling a pop song.
    I stopped my daft pirate jig, letting the strawberry that was in my hand fall back onto the huge chopping board. ‘You look too old for girlfriends.’
    ‘Hey, I’m only thirty-three. That’s not old.’ Hannu shook his black hair back and jutted out his chin, like he was showing me how young and handsome he was, but I saw worry flash through his dark eyes and I saw how he bit his lip. ‘I thought I’d mentioned her before. Actually, Niilo, we’re getting married soon. That’s part of—’
    ‘Nice.’ I stared at him, hardening my eyes, dropping the smile. ‘Probably I wasn’t listening. Probably you did mention her, and I didn’t care.’ I threw a strawberry into the pot.
    ‘Listen to me, Niilo. I’ll be leaving soon. My girlfriend has a job further north so I’ll be going away from here. I need you to know that, Niilo. And you’re doing really well.’
    I shrugged like I didn’t care what he was saying. And we worked at these blood-red strawberries for ages. We cut the berries up but it was the air between us you could have chopped.
    Suddenly Hannu blurted out, ‘Saara.’
    I frowned, like I didn’t know what he was talking about.
    ‘That’s her name.’ Hannu sounded apologetic. ‘I mean, my girlfriend.  She’s called Saara, and she likes strawberries. We’ll have one of these strawberry chocolate-fountain things at the wedding. You could come along, maybe? My band will be playing. Not me, though. I mean, you couldn’t exactly play at your own wedding, eh? They’ll have to find another bass player.’
    I made like I wasn’t listening. But inside me the big black hole had come in again and I was sinking down into it fast. Hannu was going away. He was the only teacher in this place who bothered about me and he was getting off this prison island, like everybody else did – except me.
    Hannu said nothing more about weddings and the two of us worked in silence, throwing strawberries into the huge pot, pouring in sugar, stirring the sugar into the berries, then turning the gas ring on and hoisting the heavy pan over to the cooker. There was comfort in having something to get on with, but the silence between us was awkward. I knew I was over-reacting – why shouldn’t Hannu have a life? – but I couldn’t help it. I tried to drum some sense into my brain, but it wasn’t working. I felt as though I had crawled into my capsule and sailed off a thousand miles.Hannu chewed his lip. Sometimes he looked at me, but I always looked away fast. Twice, he cleared his throat, as though he was getting ready to speak, but the words died in his throat. When finally he did speak,