Worth It by Nicki DeStasi Read Free Book Online

that it’s there if I need it, if I’m ever that desperate. In weak moments, I almost convince myself that it might help again. I clench my teeth against the urge pricking at my control.
    After I get the make-up out, I pat the powder over my face, touch up my mascara, and add a swipe of gloss to my full lips. Once I finish fixing my face, I inspect my appearance. Despite my poor self-image, I can tell I’m sort of pretty. I’m not beautiful or striking, not even close, but I guess I look okay. Coupled with the stubborn hourglass curve of my five-three frame, I can understand the draw some men have to me. I’ve been propositioned, and I’ve had a moment of love in a guy’s arms enough times to know that I hold some semblance of desirability. I wish I could be more than what is between my legs, but besides Sam and him , the only love I can find is in one-night hookups. I don’t do it often because I want to be more, but sometimes, the loneliness becomes too much. I stuff my bullshit back in its hole with practiced precision, flip the visor back up, snag my purse, and step out of my car.
    I pull my tan leather coat tighter, fighting against the chilly October New England weather, and I straighten my shoulders to appear in control of myself before I push through the door of the shop. My ears register the ding of the bell above me, and my eyes land on Donnie’s brightening expression. My lips part to return his wide denture smile.
    “Hey, Anna!” He stands, rounds the counter, and makes his way over to me.
    I stiffen briefly when he envelops me in a hug, but I quickly relax.
    “Hey, Donnie,” I reply, returning the hug.
    Between my horrible driving, the inevitable repairs needed to keep my American classic running, and his frequent visits to Village Pizza, the pizza place where I work, I see him often. He’s really nice, but he’s also touchy-feely, and it makes me uncomfortable. Warm and caring are different from everything I’ve ever known, but I try to swallow the anxiety and just go with it.
    He pulls back to look me over, and his lips turn down into a frown. “You okay, Anna?”
    Busted . I mentally slap myself for not securing my mask better, and I give him what I hope is a genuine smile. “Just the usual senior year stress. I’ll be taking the MTEL next month, and I need to pass it in order to start my practicum in the spring.”
    He smirks. “English, sweetheart. I don’t speak teacher jargon.”
    I laugh out loud, and I feel the tension ease out of my body. “The Massachusetts Tests for Educator Licensure, or as we education majors call it, the teacher test. Anyway, I still need to pass the Early Childhood test. I did well on the first two, but this is the last chance I’ll have to pass the third, so I need to do well. The practicum is just student teaching.”
    Patting my arm, he smiles kindly. “I’m sure you’ll do great, Anna. You’re a smart girl with a bright future, so no fretting. Those worry lines are unbecoming.”
    I smile and let his encouragement warm my insides. “Thanks, Donnie. I appreciate it. How’s Rose?”
    “Ah, the ole ball and chain.” He beams affectionately. “She’s doing well, keeping busy with volunteering. If you ask me, volunteering is actually just an old ladies’ gossip circle. You know how it is in these small towns.”
    I laugh at that again because he’s right. This town, Shirley, and my town, Groton are tiny towns in northwestern Massachusetts, and like most small rural areas, the gossip can be ridiculous. Having enough drama of my own, I tend to ignore who smashed so-and-so’s mailbox.
    “Yes, I do, Donnie. Although, I’m afraid I’m out of the loop for the most part.”
    “Anna, you only live two towns over, twenty minutes away. You can’t tell me the gossip doesn’t cross over.”
    “It might, but I don’t pay attention. I’m too busy working and trying to do well in school.”
    “What’s your GPA now?”
    “I think it’s around three