You're Still the One by Darcy Burke Read Free Book Online

hands to her sides and shook her head. “Sorry. I’m great. Just really tired after last night. And you’re right, things did turn out fine. As they were supposed to, I guess.”
    Supposed to. The old “things happen for a reason” bullshit or “this was meant to happen” excuse. He didn’t buy any of it, and Alex’s death had reinforced that. There was no reason or meaning in his death or in the car accident that had caused Bex to miscarry. It was tragic and terrible. Period. End of story.
    â€œIt wasn’t easy,” he said quietly. They’d stupidly had unprotected sex while she’d been taking antibiotics, which had negated the effects of her birth control pills. Upon learning she was pregnant, she’d been upset. For her, the timing had been bad because she’d had plans . For Hayden, however, the timing had been fine. He’d had a great job, a supportive family, and he’d just bought a house in the town he planned to grow old in. The stage had been set for a happily-ever-after. “I was pretty broken for a long time.”
    She took a step forward and looked as though she wanted to touch him, but that wasn’t who they were anymore. “I know. I was, too. I know you didn’t think that I was.”
    Of course she would think that. In his anger and grief, he’d accused her of wanting to lose the baby, even after they’d decided to have it and get married. But he’d been so upset. “I was young and stupid. And I felt guilty.”
    The night of the accident, they’d been arguing about where to live. It was dark, rainy, and the road had a vicious S-curve. Though he’d driven it hundreds of times, he’d miscalculated. The shoulder was unforgivingly slender and he’d driven right over it and into a deep ditch. It hadn’t been a serious accident, and the doctor had said she might’ve miscarried anyway. But the hell of it was that they’d never know. He hadn’t driven that road since.
    â€œYou don’t feel guilty anymore?” Her expression softened into a smile. “I’m glad.”
    She’d told him then that she didn’t blame him. Which was maybe why he’d been so hard on himself. When the person you loved most in the world gave you a pass for something terrible, it was hard to let go of your own culpability. Or shame. Whatever. He’d had a hard time living with himself for a while after that.
    Hadn’t they both agreed they didn’t have to discuss this? “This conversation is taking a real turn into the maudlin.” He infused his tone with as much levity as he could. “Completely unnecessary, especially as you’re about to embark on the career of your dreams.”
    She brightened. “Yes! And you’re already doing your dream job, right? How are things going over there?”
    He may as well continue the lie he’d told his siblings earlier—that he was taking the job in Burgundy. It was only part lie, he reasoned. Chances are, he would be taking the job.
    â€œReally well, actually. They offered me a position as assistant winemaker, and I start next month.”
    Her eyes widened. “Oh, wow. That’s great. Congratulations.” She squinted briefly. “How’d your parents take it?”
    He chuckled. She knew them—and him—so well. Or at least she had once. “I was just on my way down to tell them. Wish me luck.”
    She laughed, and the sound was so familiar, so filled with fond memories, that it was like smelling gingerbread and instantly feeling like Christmas. “Good luck. And now I won’t worry about staying here. I was afraid that my being here in the house might be weird—the apartment isn’t ready, and your mom doesn’t know when it will be.”
    â€œI see. Well, I’m still going to be here three or four weeks.” He studied her expression, but couldn’t quite read