A Sadness Within by Sara Fiorenzo Read Free Book Online Page A

Pachabel’s “Canon in D,” a favorite of mine.  It was like an old friend, its melody falling easily from my fingers. I let it grow and crescendo and then fade again, feeling the tension leave my body. When I played, I became someone else, and I was happy. Everything felt right, and I was able to forget. It was one of the few things that still made me feel alive.
    Suddenly, I had the feeling I wasn’t alone, and stopped playing abruptly. My eyes desperately searched the auditorium expecting to see someone, but with the stage lights on, it was impossible to see.
    “Hello?” I cried out tentatively.
    No answer.
    “Is there someone out there?”
    I scanned the empty chairs but could see no one. Then, just like that, the feeling of being watched was gone, and I was once again alone. Unnerved, I gathered my things, stood up and quickly left, barely remembering to turn the lights off as I walked out. While people listening to me play did bother me, knowing someone was there and not being able to see them alarmed me even more. Probably just a student who was embarrassed that they had been caught listening. No big deal. Wow, my imagination was really overactive today. Perhaps it was a thought that hadn’t left my mind all day unnerving me. That of Mrs. Bradley walking through her empty house all those years ago..
    Once home, I immersed myself in thoughts of all that I needed to do to get ready for auditions, and I was able to forgot about the incident at school. Takeout made for an easy dinner and would allow me to keep working. It was getting dark out and the house seemed all the more empty, making me jump when the delivery person rang the doorbell.
    After dinner, I went out to the porch to take in what was left of the sunset. Pinks and oranges painted the thin clouds that hung over the lake, while the sun had just begun to dip into the water below. I loved to sit on this porch and just watch. A faint glow from the lights at the Bradley estate down the road served as an eerie illumination. I thought back to my conversation with Celia. She really was an odd girl. I started to think about the fact that she had an older brother and caught myself wondering what he was like. Was he tall and blond? Was he a little more social than she was? What did it matter? Was I jealous that she had a brother, and I no longer did? No, not now . I pushed those thoughts deep into the crack that I felt just beneath the surface, and mentally tried to patch it. Today had been a good day.  I didn’t want to think about my family tonight. I just wanted to make it through one day without calling on the sadness that was intertwined with my life now.
    Within minutes, the sun was gone, and I felt the call of the piano. I went inside and sat down on the bench. Perhaps, I would play something new tonight. I pulled out some new music I was working on and practiced diligently. Finally, I felt my mind shut down and a different song came out. I wasn’t surprised to hear Mozart’s “Fantasy in D Minor” erupting from the keys. It was melancholy, which was how I felt now. I played for several minutes, letting the music further deepen until again, I couldn’t help but feel like I was being watched. The shades on the living room window were open, but when I looked outside, all I could see was my own startled reflection staring back at me. I reached for the shades and quickly shut them, trying hard to shake the feeling that there was someone or something out there. I reached forward and turned the light out, peering again between the shades into the darkness. My eyes could pick up nothing out of the ordinary. This was the kind of night that made me wish I had gotten that dog, or made Kara move in with me. Living alone sort of unnerved me at times, and it was easy for my imagination to get away from me. I went through the rest of the house locking the doors and shutting all the blinds, working my way upstairs. Sleep did not come easily, and when it finally