Alligator Playground by Alan Sillitoe Read Free Book Online

on I wear nothing but trousers. ‘And they spoiled you rotten. You’ve allus seen yourself as God’s gift to humanity, but you’re not to me anymore.’
    ‘I never thought I was any of that. But I loved you and still love you.’ Shame she yanked her skirt down. ‘I love you more than ever. I’ll always love you.’
    ‘You won’t if I know it.’
    ‘I will. You can’t stop me. I adore the ground you walk on.’
    ‘Oh, do you, then?’
    ‘Yes, I do.’ They were bickering. Better than ever. But he was angry with himself because stupidity was unforgivable, and bad luck frightening, which made him want comforting, so he became tender towards her in the hope that she would provide it. She mistook his attitude for contrition, and for the moment regretted her violence, almost willing to put aside the enormity of what he had done, because really there was no point when the only thing to do was walk away from this state of five-star humiliation.
    Gradually she was soothed and, after kisses that sealed a lightning-charged truce, he put on the suit in which he too had been at the party – thinking it a nice touch – and walked her to a restaurant across Holland Park Road.
    A bottle of champagne and the best food on the card would bring her round, though between each lovey-dovey clinking of glasses he reminded himself that in the morning he must go through his wallet and fax book to make sure there were no clues as to Diana or her whereabouts.
    He doesn’t know me. They had made very satisfactory love and now he had gone to sleep. He thinks an orgasm makes up for everything, and I’m going to say no more, when he’s been doing it on me ever since we got married. I see now why my body threw out his rotten kid. And all those times I went to Yorkshire on my own he was pushing his filthy cock up all the scruffy tuppences he could find.
    No wonder he’s always had so much work to do at the office and been so knackered when he got home. I could go on the razz myself but I wouldn’t do it just to get back on him. I don’t see any men I fancy these days, and if I did I don’t suppose they’d fancy me, but if ever I do do it I’ll do it in my own good time.
    He’d be easy to deceive because the only person he knows aboutis himself. All the times I’ve gone through the gamut of a bad cold or the flu without him being aware, but when he caught it, whining about who had passed it on at the office, he moaned in bed for at least three days. When they both had colds she had to deny hers because two people could no more have one at the same time than they could complain of a common misfortune – and he’d never noticed.
    The issue stopped her getting to sleep, when up to now she had fallen off the ledge and felt nothing till morning. Whoever robbed her of slumber was guilty of murdering her dreams. Her language lapsed again, something else to destroy him for: I’ll fucking kill ’er. I’ve had the sort of upbringing where I would never let anybody put one over on me. I’ve been spoiled by having it that easy, spoiled even rottener than him with his pampering, which is something he’ll never understand.
    Changing position didn’t help. His snoring, as always after he had swined and dined, was like a lawnmower going over rocky ground, but she was bothered more than before because he had set on a stoat to eat up her brain. The shit-nosed little animal was halfway through the front lobes and getting on very well towards the back, thank you very much, but soon there would be nothing left so it would turn round and start again at the front, hoping a few scraps remained from the first time through. The more it stoated back and forth the more determined she was to clock Tom and his moll who had let it loose. First of all – getting out of bed – I’ll go through his things and find out just who that bitch Diana is, because she’s not going to be like herself much longer.
    Diana often swore she would never have an affair