Alpha Dog by Jennifer Ziegler Read Free Book Online

crap. Is that clock right?”
    I stared down at my wristwatch. “Yeah. It’s almost twelve.”
    “Aw, hell. I’m supposed to meet my boyfriend for lunch.”
    I watched as she tossed her wiener dogs back into the box and hoisted it onto her hip. I recognized that focused excitement. She was a girl with a purpose—a girl with a boyfriend—and nothing else mattered at the moment. I used to be just like that.
    “So, hey. Um. You want to grab some dinner later or something?” I asked as she turned toward the door.
    “Maybe,” she said. “I don’t know how long I’ll be gone. But maybe we can hang out some more when I get back. Okay?”
    “Sounds cool,” I said.
    But she was already out the door.

    I’m sitting on the grass overlooking a windswept
shoreline. Seamus is there beside me. He pulls me up
against him, his broad shoulder making the perfect cradle
for my head. As I nestle against his sweater, he strokes
his fingers through my hair. I feel so safe, so happy. After
a while I lift my face toward his and stare into his copper-brown eyes. My hands reach up and begin tracing the
familiar terrain of his face—his perfectly carved cheek-bones, wide jaw, pencil-point cleft in his chin. Seamus
clasps each of my hands in his and kisses them softly.
Then he leans forward and presses his mouth to mine. The
earth spins faster. Animated cherubs frolic and sing!
Eventually, we pull apart. Seamus smiles down at me, his
black curls framing his features like a fuzzy dark halo.
Leaning forward, he opens his mouth and says . . .
    “Jellyfishing!”
    “Huh?” I jerked awake and found myself stretched out on the couch with a Hot Pockets sandwich wrapper on my chest. The condo was completely dark except for the TV, which was blaring an old SpongeBob Square-
Pants
episode. It took me a moment to realize where I was and what was happening.
    I hit the Lower Volume button on the remote control and sat up, rubbing my eyes until the image of Seamus fragmented and dissolved. Strange that I was dreaming about him again. Was it because Chuck dumped me? Was my poor, mangled ego trying to repair itself by focusing on a better guy? A guy cobbled together from bits of memory?
    Then again, who else did I have? All day long as I’d unpacked and shopped for groceries, it hit me at intervals just how alone I was. No boyfriend, no friends, no group to hang out with. I’d managed to keep busy and shrug it off, assuring myself that I could put it all behind me, that Christine and I would hang out later, and that would help me forget. Only, here it was almost ten-thirty and Christine still hadn’t returned—probably still in the arms of what’s-his-name.
    Now, in the stillness of the condo, the pathetic-ness that was my life hit me like never before. I lay back down and hugged a ruffly throw pillow to my chest, surrendering myself to self-pity. I missed Chuck. I missed having his arm around me, the spicy scent of his deodorant, and the sound of his rumbly voice over the phone. More than anything I missed that relationship feeling—the sense of being part of something beyond just me.
    Now I was just me. And frankly, I wasn’t enjoying my company all that much.
    The sound of knocking startled me. Someone was at the door. Christine? Chuck? Seamus? My imagination was still in overdrive. I heaved myself off the sofa, trudged to the front door and opened it. Mrs. Krantz was standing in the hallway holding Mrs. B to her chest.
    “Katie, dear!” she said. “How are you girls doing? Are you finding everything you need?”
    “Yes. Thanks,” I said, hoping my disappointment wasn’t too obvious.
    She leaned sideways and peered past me into the apartment. “It sure is dark. Where is Christine?”
    “She’s out.”
    Mrs. Krantz’s eyes widened in alarm and she stared down at her watch. “She’s gone out? At this hour?”
    I suddenly realized I was about to destroy Christine’s carefully constructed alter ego. “Uh, no,” I said quickly.