then settled into its normal pace again. âYou didnât hate her?â she asked, stunned.
âShe was my mother,â Brad said. âOf course I didnât hate her.â
âThings might have been so differentââ
âAshley,â Brad broke in, âthings werenât different. Thatâs the point. Deliaâs gone, for good this time. Youâve got to let go.â
âWhat if I canât?â Ashley whispered.
âYou donât have a choice, Button.â
Button . Their grandfather had called both her and Melissa by that nickname; like most twins, they were used to sharing things. âDo you miss Big John as much as I do?â she asked.
âYes,â Brad answered, without hesitation, his voice still gruff. He looked down at his coffee mug for a second or so, then raised his gaze to meet Ashleyâs again. âSame thing,â he said. âHeâs gone. And letting go is something I have to do about three times a day.â
Ashley got up, suddenly unable to sit still. She brought the coffee carafe to the table and refilled Bradâs cup. She spoke very quietly. âBut it was a one-time thing, letting go of Mom?â
âYeah,â Brad said. âAnd it happened a long, long time ago. I remember it distinctlyâit was the night my high school basketball team took the state championship. I was sure sheâd be in the bleachers, clapping and cheering like everybody else. She wasnât, of course, and that was when I got it through my head that she wasnât coming backâever.â
Ashleyâs heart ached. Brad was her big brother; heâd always been strong. Why hadnât she realized that heâd been hurt, too?
âBig John stayed , Ashley,â he went on, while she sat there gulping. âHe stuck around, through good times and bad. Even after heâd buried his only son, he kept on keeping on. Mom caught the afternoon bus out of town and couldnât be bothered to call or even send a postcard. I did my mourning long before she died.â
Ashley could only nod.
Brad was quiet for a while, pondering, taking the occasional sip from his coffee mug. Then he spoke again. âHereâs the thing,â he said. âWhen the chips were down, I basically did the same thing as Momâgot on a bus and left Big John to take care of the ranch and raise the three of you all by himselfâso Iâm in no position to judge anybody else. Bottom line, Ash? People are what they are, and they do what they do, and you have to decide either to accept that or walk away without looking back.â
Ashley managed a wobbly smile. Sniffled once. âIâm sorry Iâm late on the mortgage payments,â she said.
Brad rolled his eyes. âLike Iâm worried,â he replied, his body making the subtle shifts that meant heâd be leaving soon. With one arm, he gestured to indicate the B&B. âWhy wonât you just let me sign the place over to you?â
âWould you do that,â Ashley challenged reasonably, âif our situations were reversed?â
He flushed slightly, got to his feet. âNo,â he admitted, âbutââ
âBut what?â
Brad grinned sheepishly, and his powerful shoulders shifted slightly under his shirt.
âBut youâre a man?â Ashley finished for him, when he didnât speak. âIs that what you were going to say?â
âWell, yeah,â Brad said.
âYouâll have the mortgage payments as soon as I get a chance to run Jackâs credit card,â she told her brother, rising to walk him to the back door. Color suffused her cheeks. âThanks for coming into town,â she added. âI feel like a fool for panicking.â
In the midst of pulling on his jacket, Brad paused. âIâm a big brother,â he said, somewhat gruffly. âItâs what we do.â
âAre you and Meg going to the