beats per minute by Alex Mae Read Free Book Online Page A

nearly two o’clock! How could that be true? With
considered effort, she struggled to her feet, and clutched at her handbag. It
was like moving through water. She scanned the dancefloor. She could not see
Marie anywhere.
    Turning back to the booth, her question died on her lips.
The alcove was deserted. She was alone.
     

Chapter
Four: Sixteen
    The enormous cake wobbled slightly as Bridey set it down,
studying the frosted surface anxiously. The tiered construction alternated
layers of vanilla sponge with raspberry cream and a rich chocolate sponge with
fudge centre, all covered with delicately piped, pale pink icing. Her concerns
were unfounded; it was a mouth-watering masterpiece. But Bridey stood in front
of it for a long while. She was determined that everything should be perfect
today.
    When Con returned from picking up the morning paper some
time later, Bridey was suddenly very thankful for those snatched, precious
moments of peace. Her mind felt so full. She supposed it was something she was
meant to get used to; she was older and her brain was now like an overstuffed
closet, brimming with all the baggage she had accumulated over the years.
Keeping secrets, never easy, seemed such a struggle now. Age had made her more
easily forgetful but most of all she had simply lost patience with it: looking
back over her life, she felt acutely that the sacrifices, the burden of
suppression and the loss of Joseph, had not been worth the misery. She wanted
to embrace her granddaughter, not continually keep her at arm’s length for fear
of what she might let slip. It was the only point on which she and Con had not
seen eye to eye for the past decade or so.
    At least he had agreed not to punish Raegan for the previous
evening’s mishaps and Bridey was able to stick to the original plan: a
home-cooked celebratory luncheon, just the three of them (which had been
delayed quite a bit as the birthday girl showed no signs of surfacing after her
late night); though Con expressed misgivings as to whether Raegan’s sixteenth
birthday was something to celebrate. And though Bridey did not falter
throughout her festive preparations – rolling out pastry, icing the cake and
wrapping gifts with the same deft decisiveness - she shared her husband’s
reservations. They might not agree on how it should be achieved but they were
equal in their determination to keep their granddaughter safe – which was
becoming increasingly difficult as she blossomed and they aged. And cutting
through it all was the ever-present sense of absence; Bridey’s heart gave a great
lurch as she considered how differently today might have been... if only...
    A hand on her shoulder interrupted these maudlin thoughts.
It was heavy but comforting, silently attesting that she was not alone in her
grief. She gripped it with one of her own. After a moment,
Con moved to stand beside her.
    ‘Sixteen already.’
    ‘Hard to believe.’
    ‘And yet so easy,’ Bridey said sadly. ‘She seems so much
older, sometimes.’
    ‘She’s been through a lot.’
    ‘Too much. I wish I could give her
it all back. But loss… changes a person. Steals the years
away. The innocence. It all gets taken,
somehow.’
    ‘She looked every inch the bright young thing when I picked
her up last night,’ he said softly. ‘Though I could’ve
strangled her for being so careless.’
    He sounded tired; beaten down, somehow. But before Bridey
had a chance to ask what was on his mind, the door opened with a tentative
creak and the object of their ruminations stepped into the room.
    Raegan, still dressed in her baggy Eeyore pyjamas, looked decidedly
unbright (her complexion was pasty and puffy as Bridey’s uncooked piecrust, in
fact). She hung her head.
    ‘Morning.’
    Con grunted and turned away as if he could not bring himself
to look at her. Bridey had no such reticence; rushing forward, she enveloped
her granddaughter in a warm, floury embrace. ‘Oh, happy
birthday, darling girl! Take a seat