Because She Loves Me by Mark Edwards Read Free Book Online Page A

pose for you naked, please don’t ever show me the picture.’
    That set them off again and led on to a conversation about penises that got ruder and ruder as we walked around the gallery, the two of them giggling like schoolgirls and pointing at portraits of historical figures and rock stars.
    ‘Six inches, I reckon.’
    ‘I’d say he’s got a nine-incher.’
    ‘A disappointment.’
    Finally bored of this game, Charlie went into the gift shop and came out with a present for Tilly: a print of the Queen.
    ‘Next time you meet her, you can ask her to sign it,’ she said.
    After that, Charlie surprised us by announcing that she had booked us a table at the excellent restaurant upstairs. ‘I’m paying,’ she said and when Tilly and I tried to protest she told us she’d won some cash on a scratchcard and was feeling flush.
    We spent the afternoon walking around Covent Garden, looking in the shops, the two girls browsing the sales. Charlie bought herself a black silky top and bought me a new jumper, 50 per cent cashmere, which was exactly my kind of thing.
    Towards the end of the afternoon, Charlie said she was going to run back to a shop we’d looked in earlier, and left Tilly and me alone.
    ‘So?’ I said.
    Tilly raised an eyebrow. ‘You mean, what do I think of her? She’s lovely. Amazing. Sweet and gorgeous and a real laugh. Where on earth did you find her? Did you make her in a lab like those boys in Weird Science ?’
    I was thrilled to hear this. ‘I’m worried she’s too good for me.’
    ‘Well . . .’ Seeing my face she added, ‘I’m only kidding, Andrew. The two of you look awesome together. It’s great to see you so happy.’
    ‘Thanks, sis.’ I paused. ‘What about you? How are you doing at the moment?’
    ‘Me? I’m fine.’
    ‘Are you sure?’
    ‘Why are you asking?’
    ‘Oh. I don’t know. I just thought you seemed a bit down over Christmas.’
    She looked at me suspiciously. ‘Did Rachel say something to you? Only, she was acting very suspiciously when she came back from dropping you at the station. Plus she took ages. I thought the two of you had eloped. And then she was ultra-interested when I told her I was coming up to see you today.’
    ‘No. She didn’t say anything.’
    ‘Hmm. Well, I’m honestly fine. I was seeing this guy and was upset when he gave me the heave-ho, but I’m not depressed or anything like that.’
    ‘But . . .’ I decided to come clean. ‘Rachel told me you’re on antidepressants.’
    Tilly’s face was stony. ‘Did she? For fuck’s sake. I wish she’d keep this,’ she touched her nose, ‘out of it.’
    ‘She was worried about you, that’s all.’
    ‘So you decided you needed to do something to cheer me up? The poor crippled charity case.’
    I was mortified. Her voice was loud and people around us, in the street, were gawping. ‘Tilly. It’s not like that. Rachel told me you were down and I felt bad that I hardly ever see you. It’s not a charity thing. Come on, you know me better than that.’
    She calmed down. ‘OK. But, listen. Yes, I have been depressed. It happens. It’s not something you can fix with a day out, but it’s not a huge deal. I cope. I have medication which makes me feel better and I’ve actually been feeling pretty bright since Christmas. Looking forward to a new year.’ She gazed into the crowd. ‘And I really appreciate you trying to cheer me up. It’s been a brilliant day and, despite being a bit useless when it comes to emotional stuff, you are a good brother, OK? Now give me a hug.’
    I stooped to embrace her.
    ‘I’m sorry,’ I whispered.
    ‘You’ve got nothing to be sorry about. But you can’t fix me. You just have to be there for me.’
    When I straightened up I saw Charlie standing a few metres away, watching us, a serious expression on her face. When she realised I’d seen her she came over.
    ‘I’d better be getting back,’ Tilly said.
    We got a cab to Victoria and Charlie and I waited