Bleed by Laurie Faria Stolarz Read Free Book Online Page B

thousand puffs, like she couldn’t breathe, like she was going to pass out.
    There are hives dotted across my chest like navigational points. I need to breathe, to relax. Robby would never hurt me. He served his time. He paid for his mistakes. Plus, it was an accident. I’ve thought so all along. An accident. I remind myself of these things all the way down the stairs and into the kitchen for breakfast. Only, I can’t possibly eat.
    Grace, my father’s wife (though, young enough to be my older sister) is hunched over her usual dry toast with black coffee, and doing today’s crossword puzzle. “Where’s Dad?” I ask.
    No answer.
    “Hello?”
    “Oh, hi,” she says, finally noticing me. “There’s coffee and muffins on the counter.”
    “Not hungry.”
    She eyes me up and down, from my chlorine-yellow hair—a victim of my father’s pool—to my French-manicured toes, and then nods. Whatever that means. Tina and Chelsea, my four-year-old half sisters, chase each other into the kitchen and hop into the booth seat, opposite Grace.
    “Are you coming to the zoo with us, Kelly?” Chelsea asks.
    I look at Grace. Her face is blank, like I could scribble all over it (and wouldn’t I like to). The lump in my chest breaks, and shards splinter into my gut. I don’t know why it bothers me, why I let it, or why I even care.
    “Oh, yeah,” Grace says, in her deadpan tone. “Your father and I are taking the twins to the zoo today. Of course you’re welcome to join us.”
    “Kelly’s coming! Kelly’s coming!” Tina shouts.
    Grace looks at Tina, wishing, I suspect, that she had a muzzle handy.
    “I have plans,” I say, turning on my heel, making my way across the marble-tiled floor, hearing Grace ask the twins for a three-letter word for angry.
    I find my father in his office, doing the kind of take-home work my mother used to complain about. “I’m going out,” I announce to him.
    “That’s fine,” he says. “Give us a call if you need a ride home.”
    “I’ll probably just have Robby drop me off.”
    “Okay, Kell, have a good time.”
    I feel like blurting out that it’s Robby Mardonia. Robby I-killed-my-girlfriend-because-she-tried-to-break-up-with-me Mardonia. But I don’t even think it would matter. So why does it matter to me?
    I go back upstairs to spritz on a healthy amount of A Minuit. I wonder if Robby can still smell it on my letters. I picture him curled up beside them on some roll-away cot, thinking about the two of us.
    I probably should have told him more about Sean, told him that we did end up dating after all. Part of me dated Sean out of spite. After I told Nicole he wanted to go out with me, she said we’d have nothing in common. When I asked her what she meant, she shrugged and said that one of us would probably get bored. I didn’t need to guess who she meant.
    But it wasn’t just spite. Part of me wanted to go out with Sean because he was sweet and nice and simple. And did his homework. And volunteered on the yearbook staff. And because Nicole, one of the people I trust most in this world, trusted him.
    Then there was the simple truth—Sean was nothing like Derik LaPointe. All fingers and hands. So when Nicole confirmed the fact that she was over Sean, that she wanted to forget about him, it pretty much sealed the deal for me. And Sean and I ended up a couple. And, I’ll have to admit, it’s been sort of nice.
    I suddenly feel guilty. I look down at my watch. It’s a little after one o’clock on the East Coast, which means Sean’s probably just finishing up his landscaping job. I still have a few extra minutes. Maybe I should call him. Maybe the sound of his voice will thwack me to my senses, make me realize that this is completely insane.
    Or maybe I’ll just want to see Robby all the more.
    I pick up the phone and dial. It goes straight to voice mail.
    I take it as a sign, hang up, squeeze into the blister-making sandals, and head out to meet Robby.
    We’re meeting at the