Blurring Lines by Chloe Walsh Read Free Book Online

fire. Master didn’t care about the blood between my thighs or the bruises on my waistline.
    Master just carried on the same as he had done every day that I had been here, gutting my skin, roasting my body in agony. And I float away the same way I always had: out of my body, out of this cell, and away from this pain.
    “The stars will have to wait … I need you on the ground with me …”
    Cade.
    “The stars will have to wait … I need you on the ground with me …”
    Cade.
     
     
     
    ****

 
    Summer 2004
    Age 17

Mackenzie
    May 5 th , 2004
     
     
    Almost two years had passed since I saw Cade Mathews, and I was beginning to forget what he smelled like. I tried to make myself remember but it was hard because there were so many men – so many men – with so many different scents.
    Alcohol, tobacco, sex, filth, grime, aftershave, sweat …
    I didn’t think I would be able to pick Cade out of a crowd anymore.
    My feelings were dead. Sometimes I wondered if I was dead. I could have been … except my heart was still beating and my lungs kept refilling.
    I couldn’t remember what my life had been like before the nest.
    I didn’t want to remember.
    Remembering wouldn’t help me here.
    Accepting this for what it was would help me ...
    The crack of a whip against my bare skin caused me to still.
    “Pretty sunshine,” Master whispered in my ear. “Don’t let me down.”
    I obediently dropped to my knees – like all the others – with my head bent and my hands tied behind my back.
    And then I waited.
    I waited just like all the others to be picked.
    It wouldn’t take long.
    I was always picked first.
    And I was always shared.
    The second I felt fingernails dig into the back of my scalp, I clenched my eyes shut and used my memories to create the mirage that kept me alive.
    These were Cade’s hands on my body.
    This was Cade touching me.
    This was Cade entering my body.
    What was happening to me was okay because it was with Cade.
    Cade was my master …
    “The stars will have to wait … I need you on the ground with me …”
    Cade.
    “The stars will have to wait … I need you on the ground with me …”
    Cade.
     
     
     
    ****

Cade
    July 28 th , 2004
     
     
     
    Emily McAllister asked me to go to the movies with her during lunch yesterday, and I said yes.
    A huge part of me felt like I was betraying Mackenzie by going out with Emily, but the survival instinct inside of my body demanded I go.
    It was the same survival instinct inside of me that demanded I stop living in the past and move on.
    The case was closed last month, which meant the cops had given up hope that Mackenzie would be found.
    I reckoned everyone had.
    I missed Mackenzie so damn bad though, and I didn’t want to give up on her, but it had been over two years and I was so goddamn lonely …
     
     
     
     
    ****
     

Autumn 2004
    Age 17

Cade
    September 21 st , 2004
     
     
     
    “What are you doing after school today?” Ezra asked as we walked down the hallways of Preston High.
    “Nothing much,” I replied quietly.
    “Do you wanna go the movies with me?” he asked. “We could invite Rita and Emily – make a night of it?”
    “Nah.” Reaching my locker, I tapped in my code before grabbing my trig textbook from the top of the pile. “I might head down to the creek and …”
    “And what, Cade?” Ezra demanded, suddenly furious, and slamming my locker door shut. “Jesus Christ, dude, she’s gone! It’s been over two years. When are you going to get that?”
    He looked me dead in the eyes, “You’ve got to stop torturing yourself like this.”
    The only reason I wasn’t kicking Ezra’s ass right now was because I knew he was saying this shit because he cared. He was the one who’d found me with a rope down at the creek last Christmas. He just wanted to help me.
    But he didn’t fucking get it.
    None of them did …
    “She has to be out there,” I hissed, low enough so the students passing us in the hall couldn’t hear.