buy it. It’s a good one,” I respond, turning my back on him. It is a good line . Too good, because I wish he could do that. I instinctively know that Crusher would do more damage than any man before or after him, if he hurt me. When you have my scars, that’s saying something. It’s just not worth the risk.
“Believe me gorgeous, I’ve seen you and I’m not going to give up until you let me all the way in.”
My breath stops. I know it’s a game for him, a chase. Just once though, I think I might like a man to look at me and see the real me. I don’t think anyone has, except maybe Ray. I even manage to keep most of my shit hidden from Nic. I do wonder what Crusher would think of the real me. It doesn’t matter. Crusher makes me weak . I can’t be weak again. I have to get rid of him. I have to find some reason to make him leave me alone so I am off his radar. The thought makes me sad.
“Hey D-Man, you got company!” I call out, trying to ignore the way my palms are sweating. I definitely need to medicate, if I’m going to survive tonight.
“Yo! Dragon, we got trouble man,” Crusher adds, as Nicole and Dragon come down the stairs. Dragon is carrying Nicole yet again, the man sure seems to like to cart her around.
“I can walk you know.” Nicole grumbles, but the flush on her face tells me that she likes his attention.
Dragon waits until they get to the bottom of the stairs to let her down. Then he takes her by the hand, walking over to where we’re standing. It’s as if he can’t stand to be away from her touch.
“Sorry man, didn’t mean to interrupt. Hey Darlin’,” Crush tells Nicole. I can’t help but notice how he takes in every detail of Nicole’s body, and my stomach turns. This is just another reason why I can’t even contemplate letting Crusher anywhere near me. He’s eye fucking Nicole, after feeding me lines about wanting me.
He’s wearing a black muscle shirt and showing off his gorgeous ink. He really is too beautiful to believe. Nicole and Dragon start bickering and it pulls my attention away from Crusher, which is good—since he’s still panting after Nicole.
“Hey,” Nicole mutters, as Dragon yanks her to his side.
“Quit checking Crush out before I have to kill him,” Dragon complains.
I listen to Dragon’s words and I can’t help but be annoyed with all three of them. I walk off into the kitchen pretending to be uninterested. In reality it’s time I take some pills.
“Hey boss? Man, we got shit going on. Need you out at Pussy’s now.”
“OH MY GOD! YOU HAVE A PLACE CALLED PUSSY’S!?!?!?!”
“It’s a strip joint. That’s where I was a couple nights ago, Nic. Some hot looking women there.” I supply without looking over my shoulder.
“Of course it’s a strip joint! Dear Lord, I bet you even picked out the name, didn’t you, Dragon?”
“Shut it, Mama.”
I tune them out after that. Those two fuss, fight, and then fuck. I’ve only seen it up close twice, but I know the drill.
I grab a wine cooler and find the cabinet I stash my meds in. Nicole has never mentioned them. I don’t know if she has investigated to see what I’m taking or if she just figures she knows and lets it slide.
I’m sitting at the table, trying to calm my heart and vaguely listening to the conversation in the living room. What I hear, doesn’t help my anxiety. Crusher is telling Dragon about some woman named Jess who was beaten. Dragon’s reply hits my stomach…sour.
“Pissed off man?” Dragon asks.
Is there any other kind? I sit there and replay Dragon’s question in my mind and it pisses me off that he says it so calmly . Is this the shit he deals with every day in his world? Is that why he sets off my warning bells?
“That’s just it, Boss…she had a note taped to her chest.” Crush reaches inside his jacket pocket and hands Dragon a piece of folded white paper.
Dragon opens the paper and you can see it’s covered with blood. My panic inches up