Confessions of a Serial Kisser by Wendelin Van Draanen Read Free Book Online Page B

tardy Nazi."
    "Are you giving him a second chance?"
    I pulled a horrified face. "No!"
    She laughed and called, "I'll meet you in the quad at break, okay?" She stopped short. "No, wait! Meet me in Ms. Pickney's room! My page is only half done and the deadline's Thursday! I need every second I can get!"
    I called, "Right!" and hurried off with a smile and a wave.

23
    Hippity-Hop!
    T HE BIG SURPRISE DURING MATH was having to avoid eye contact with Robbie Marshall. After the fish kiss he'd totally ignored me, which was more than fine with me. But now suddenly he was watching me, grinning slyly at me, casually flexing his biceps.
    What was up with that?
    After class I got my question answered.
    "You want to go out?" he asked, catching my arm as he whispered it in my ear.
    I pulled away. "Uh...no."
    "Aw, c'mon. We'd be good together."
    I stopped and turned to face him. "What about Sunshine?"
    He shrugged. "We're kinda broken up."
    "
Kinda
broken up?"
    "Look," he whispered, "we could just try it out.... She doesn't have to know!"
    I gave him an Adriennesque squint. "You're disgusting, you know that?" Then I huffed off.
    Stu Dillard was the one who provided some clarity to Robbie's sudden renewed interest in me. "Hippity-hop, E
van
geline!" he called as I approached Mr. Anderson's world history boredom tomb. Then he put his index fingers up like devil's horns and wiggled them.
    At first I didn't get it, but as I slid into my seat, a wave of nausea knocked me flat.
    It couldn't be!
    I hadn't even
done
anything!
    But what else could the wiggly ears and hippity-hop comment be about?
    Justin Rodriguez had been talking rabbits!

24
    Shack Attack
    T HERE WAS NO WAY I COULD CONCENTRATE in world history. If Stu knew, so did half the school.
    Talk about rabbits--I wanted to crawl into a hole and die!
    I couldn't believe it. How could this have happened? Overnight I'd gotten a reputation?
    I hadn't even
done
anything!
    And there was no way I was going to let some sneezy twerp and his pint-sized posse talk trash about me! At break I stormed around until I found Justin on his way to the Snack Shack.
    "What's the big idea?" I asked, and I actually pushed his chest with both my hands.
    He stumbled back a step and grinned. "Whoa!"
    "Stop that!" I snapped, because I hated the smug way he was looking at me. "I can't believe you told people what I said. You know I didn't mean it that way! You startled me and it just popped out of my mouth!"
    He gave a little twitch of the shoulder. "I didn't broadcast it. I just told Blaine and Travis."
    "Yeah? Well Stu Dillard called out 'Hippity-hop' to me this morning, so someone somewhere's broadcasting!"
    He said, "Sorry," like he couldn't care less. Then he shook his head and said, "I still don't really get why you wanted to meet me--"
    I was so exasperated and so
mad
that I just blurted out, "I wanted a kiss. That's all! Just one perfect kiss. And for some insane reason I thought
you
could deliver it! But instead, you delivered your obnoxious little friends and disgusting
sneezes.
And now I have to--"
    Before I could finish my rant, he grabbed me, pulled me toward him, and planted a kiss.
    Only he kind of missed.
    His lips were half on my lips and half off, which was really awkward. And he tried to adjust, but it was just...wrong.
    Besides, I didn't want him to kiss me on the outskirts of the Snack Shack! I'd wanted him to kiss me in a gazebo in the moonlight. I'd wanted tender, melting lips. A
fantasy
kiss.
    This kiss wasn't crimson!
    It was a murky, muddled gray!
    I tried to pull away from him, but he had his hands clamped on my upper arms and bent forward to stay connected.
    I felt a surge of panic.
    I was trapped!
    Held hostage by a crooked kiss!
    When pulling back only made him bend farther forward, I twisted my head to the side and jerked free. But in the process I lost my balance, staggered backward, and fell against an overflowing trash can.
    I went down with a
crash,
knocking garbage everywhere.
    One