shitting me? What is it with vehicles
and me?
Hanging onto the steering wheel, I pull off toward the shoulder of the road as my
jeep comes to a bumpy and unsteady stop. I jump out of the car to see that my poor
tire is blown to shreds and the rim is all bent up. Just my fucking luck.
I tug. I wiggle. I kick my tire, but that rim is bent to shit and it’s not going anywhere.
Why me? Like seriously. I need a fucking drink because this shit is just too much.
Sticking my head back inside, I grab my phone and try Tank. Of course his phone is
off. I try Gin and get him, thankfully.
“Sis?” Gin answers on the first ring.
“Jeep blew a tire.” I tell him. His response is exactly like I expected it would be. “Change it then.” He says lamely, like I didn’t think of that already.
“Tried, asshole. The rim is bent. Come get me.”
“Alright. ‘Bout twenty out.”
Leaning against the door, I hear tires crunching on the gravel of the shoulder. Looking
behind me, I see a man in a big truck I don’t recognize pull up.
“Hey you need a hand?” The guy calls over to me while stepping out of his old beat
up Chevy.
Probably not a good idea, but I yell back.
“Uh, yeah. Sure.”
Reaching back inside, I grab the small hunting knife from under the seat and tuck
it into my pocket. God knows who this guy is and with my luck with men, he’s probably
a psycho looking for his next kill.
Walking up he says, “Names Mike.”
“Lilly.” I offer him.
“Had a blowout, I see. The wife had one a few months back and she couldn’t get the
thing off herself. It was bitch. Need a hand?”
I wave a hand towards the tire, giving him free rein. Why not let him go at it. I
got nowhere with it.
“If you want to, but I’ve got a ride comin’.” I tell him.
Partially because it’s true and partially because if he wants to kill me, chop me
into small pieces and stuff me into a suitcase for later, he might think twice if
he knows people will be coming for me.
“Don’t mind. Someone helped my wife until I got there. Good road karma.” He seems
genuine and sincere so I let him help me. Better him getting greasy hands then me
anyway.
I left my road side knight and shining armor to do his thing. I was no help so I figure
I might as well clean up the contents of my purse that’s all over the floor. Seems
kind of befitting for the kind of day I’m having. Shit being broken and spilled, and
me having to clean them up. Poetic justice, I suppose.
I’m shoving my lip gloss back into my purse when I hear the familiar rumble of pipes.
I’m sweeping the rest of my shit back into its home when I hear him. Shit. Shit. Shit.
“Where the fuck’s my woman?” Tanks furious voice growls at the man and he’s not sounding
happy. Where the fuck did he come from? He wasn’t answering his phone. Jesus Christ,
his timing is fabulous.
“Uh. Um . Yeah she…” Sticking my head around the side of the Jeep I spot Tank looming over
my little helper. God he looks huge next to the small, scared man. My nervous friend
Mike glances around. I’m sure he has no clue what’s going on and Tank’s just staring
at him like he might perform magic for him or something.
“Where fuck she is before I snap your fuckin’ neck.” Tank threatens the poor guy.
Mike steps back and looks around for something to probably bonk Tank over the head
with, not that that would stop Tank. He’s a man on a mission.
“Calm down Tank. I got a flat and he was nice enough to stop and help me till Gin
got here. His name is Mike.” Tilting his head around the guy, he gives me thorough
once over. He sees that I’m fine, so now he looks bored and mildly annoyed.
“Mike?” he repeats stupidly. All I do is nod. It doesn’t
Jan (ILT) J. C.; Gerardi Greenburg