Darkwater by Georgia Blain Read Free Book Online

hauled a couple of the kids up and tried to fight them when they refused to leave. Lyndon was the only one who took up the challenge. Another time, the police were called by neighbours, and once, a kid was taken to hospital after nearly drowning in the pool. Dee and several other parents had banned Cherry’s parties unless adults were present. Joe just never told Dee that was where he was going.
    Amanda said she and Cherry weren’t really friends. ‘I just hang with her at the moment. What’s so strange about that?’
    â€˜Nothing,’ Joe assured her.
    â€˜I don’t see why everyone goes on about it.’ She sounded irritated.
    And then she told him she had to get going.
    â€˜Already?’ I could hear the disappointment in Joe’s voice. He asked if she was all right.
    Her reply was monosyllabic.
    Thinking the conversation was now over and that Cassie would finally let me put a record on, I slipped the vinyl out of the sleeve and held it between my hands. Cassie was waving her nails in the heat of the afternoon breeze, the smell of the enamel acrid and sharp. Suddenly she put a finger to her lips, telling me to wait. I almost ignored her, but then I too heard Amanda’s voice as she told Joe she was a mess. It was a comment that surprised me, just as her tears had, because I couldn’t even begin to guess what someone like her had to be troubled about.
    â€˜Everything is wrong.’ She stood up now, the loose gravel on the roof crunching under her feet. ‘Home is shit. School is shit. I’m–’
    She stopped.
    â€˜I’ve got to go,’ she told Joe.
    â€˜I’ll walk with you.’
    She refused.
    He told her he had to go the shop anyway, to get stuff for dinner.
    I knew it was a lie.
    Amanda became agitated. ‘I need to be on my own.’
    Give up, I wanted to tell Joe. Let her go. And it seemed he eventually realised that for himself.
    â€˜God, he wants her bad,’ Cassie told me, giggling as she flicked her hair out of her eyes. Someone had recently told her that she had great hair and she never tired of reminding herself and her friends of the fact. ‘Let’s go and nick some of his dope.’
    â€˜No way.’ I looked at her like she’d lost her mind.
    She rolled her eyes. ‘He’ll never know.’
    At the end of last year, Sonia, Cassie and I had tried dope together under the Gladesville Bridge. Cassie had nicked it from her mum, Karen. The three of us huddled together in the shade of the concrete pylons, the roar of the traffic overhead punctuated by regular thumps as the cars sped over the supports. The river was steely, smooth and slick in the stillness, as we all took turns drawing back on the joint. I coughed enough to cry and didn’t feel a thing. Sonia giggled and said she felt a little weird. Cassie swore she was out of it. Lying down in a bed of purple jacaranda flowers and spreading her arms overhead, she told us she was floating on a sea of mauve, all the way to heaven.
    Since then, Cassie told us she’d had it a few times and it got better each time she rolled up and smoked. Now, she wanted to do it again. ‘I’ll ask him for some,’ she said, tucking her hair behind her ears.
    I forbade her from going near Joe. ‘He’s not even here,’ I said, certain I’d heard the front door close, followed by the clang of the gate on its hinges.
    I was right. He wasn’t home. Later, when Cassie left, I found him walking up from the waterfront with Sammy at his heels. He scooped her up in his arms and held her close, breathing in her warmth, and then seeing me, he put her down again.
    â€˜Where’s Amanda?’ I asked him, half-wanting to stir him and then, as he stared at me, deciding against it. ‘She seemed upset.’
    He told me she’d gone home ages ago.
    Later, I wondered whether he’d headed out to follow her, to find out what was wrong. He’d