Diary of a Crush: Kiss and Make Up by Sarra Manning Read Free Book Online Page A

had to say. Like, as if I’d ever want Mia again after I’d had you in my arms.
    So, anyway I don’t think it was seeing me and Veronique together that’s caused your complete absence from my life. I did hear you having an angry exchange with Carter (when I heard you hissing at him it brought back memories of that awful argument we had in the dining room of the hideous Hôtel Du Lac) but I can’t believe that one sardonic sculpture student with a love of stirring it up could send you scurrying into hibernation. (He thought you were a complete babe, by the way.)
    The only explanation I can have for the way the girl I formerly knew as Edie is never in when I call or has always just gone on her lunch when I go to the café where she works (why do you take your lunch-break at 5pm anyway?) or has already made plans with Shona is that she hates me. Irrevocably hates me and there’s no cure.
    But I don’t hate you , Edie. You bug the hell out of me but I still miss you like mad. Don’t get me wrong, I’m really into Veronique but there’ll always be a little part of me that’s yours alone. I think you must have cast a spell on me. I miss the way you pull the caramel off a Twix and then nibble the chocolate round the edges before finally eating the rest of the bar in three decisive bites. I miss you reading books about crazy girls (they always reminded me of you) while I lay on your bed and looked up at the cloudy sky that you’d painted on your bedroom ceiling. And I miss the way you’d bite your lip and blush when you wanted me to kiss you. But, most of all, I miss those kisses and how right it felt to hold you.
    Like I said when we went to Blackpool I’ll always love you but I just can’t be with you, Edie. When we were together I spent all my time walking on eggshells while you suspected me of chasing other girls. And those glimpses of that other Edie, the one who doesn’t have a heart, became more and more frequent. I s’pose what really finished us off was the way you disappeared to Brighton for weeks after sending me that email, that was like an exercise in doublespeak. I needed a codebreaker just to understand what you were talking about and before I could even ask you, you’d gone. And for the record, I always thought it was you who chucked me .
    Those weeks that you were in Brighton were some of the worst weeks of my life. I felt like you’d stolen half my soul away and then I met Veronique. I’m not just going out with her on the rebound, I really like her. She gets me. I get her. There’s no confusion. And I think the two of you would really get on if you gave each other a chance. But I guess that’s the last thing you want to hear. What I’m really writing to tell you is that I’m finally moving out of my mum’s house (I can’t take the stress any more) and getting a flat with Simon, Carter and Paul. All the details are at the bottom of this email so you know where to find me.
    I guess you still think that I treated you terribly and that I was only interested in getting you into bed (which is only slightly true) but I’ll tell you one thing, ten years from now when you’re doing fabulous things and making the world weep with wonder, I’m going to come and find you so we can go on that road trip we always talked about and raise a family of beautiful, artistically precocious little freaks.
    Come back wherever you are.
    Toxically yours
    Dylan
    Why does he always do this? Just when I want him to let me go, he always finds a way to come hurtling back into my life with all the velocity of a freakin’ bullet.
     
20th November
    I’ve read that email from Dylan a million times and I can’t work out whether I should be hating his guts or still pining after him. I think the pining will win out in the end. I saw him the day after he sent it as I was standing outside the café waiting for Anna to open up. He came out of Rhythm with a mug of coffee, which he handed to me.
    ‘What’s this for?’ I