Diary Of A Wimpy Kid Book Series by Jeff Kinney Read Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Jeff Kinney
Tags: Young Adult Fiction, Comedy
oroonj wi+h cherry lif ^loss for fibers, o+ leas+ now
you
know how i+ oil 0o+ s+or+ej.
'Thors joy
In school +o
To
t)« hohes+ wi+k you, X +kihk +kaVs a really dumb message +o be +ellihg kids, especially +ke ohes a+ my school.
La+er oh, ikey made ah ahhouhcemeh-f -+ka+
+kere are Some opehihgs oh +ke Safety Pa+rols, ahd +ka+ go+ me +kihkihg.
Tf
someohe picks oh a Sa-fe-ty Patrol, i+ cah ge+ +kem suspehded. Xke way X
fi$vrt
<+, X cah use ahy ex+ra pro+ec-tioh X cah ge+.
Plus, X realized +ka+ maybe beihg ih a posi+ioh of
au+kori-ty could be good
for
me.
x
;rx x
f
Mr
-
Whit
/ “~u ~w „
l
«
Ct
v
"
PS
'J^SJ-fa - so~tU,
ISJ'
m
T "
p
u
*>•j“■*
h
*
W
“ °"
r
^ W
3
“ tk« spot.
Mr. Vlinsky said the openings were fior a special assignment. Our school is right next to the elementary school, and they've got a halfi-day kindergarten -there.
He wants us +o walk -the morning session kids hone in -the middle
of
-the day. X realized that meant we would miss twenty minutes
of
Pre-Algebra. Rowley must have -figured that out, too, because he started to speak up. But X gave him a wicked pinch underneath the desk befiore he could -finish
X couldn't believe my luck. X was getting instant bully protection and a -free pass firom halfi
of
Pre-Algebra, and X didn’t even have to lifit a finger.
XVi idling you, X've got i+ made witk tkis Safety Patrol tking.
At 12:15, me and Rowley left sckool and walked tke kindergartners kome. Xke wkole trip a+e up forty-five minutes, and tkere were only twenty mnutes
of
Pre-Algefcra left wken we got tack.
Vlalking tke kids kome was no sweat. But one of tke kindergartners started to smell a lit-He funny, and X tkink mayke ke kad an accident in kis pants.
He tried to let me know atout it, tut X just stared straigkt akead and kept walking. XII take tkese kids kome, tut kelieve me, X didn’t sign up for any diaper duty.
FEBRUARY
Vlcdnesday
Today it snowed for the first tine this winter, and school was canceled. VJe were supposed to have a test in Pre-Algebra, and X’ve kind of slacked
off
ever since X became a Safety Patrol. So X was psyched.
X called Rowley and told him to come over. Me and him have been talking about building the worlds biggest snowman for the past couple of years now.
And when X say the worlds biggest snowman, X'ni not kidding. Our goal is to get into the "Guinness Book of Viorid Records."
f»S/y
r
But every time weve gotten serious about gahg /or tHe record all tHe snow Has melted, arid we've missed our window of opportunity. So +his year, X wanted to get started rigHt away.
VJHen Rowley came over, we started rolling tHe first snowball to make tHe base. X figured tHe base was going to Have to be at least eigHt feet tall on its own if we wanted to Have a sHot at breaking tHe record. But tHe snowball got real Heavy, and we Had to take a buncH of breaks in between rolls so we could catcH our breatH
Poring one
of
our breaks, Mon cane oo+side +o
30 +0
+He grocery s+ore, but oor snowball was blocking Her car in. So we go+ a li+-He
frtt
labor
00
+
of
Her.
After oor break, ne and Rowley yosHed +Ha+ snowball on+il we cooldn*+ yosH it any far+Her. Bo+ wHen we looked beHind os, we saw +He ness we Had nade.
Our plan to build tKe world’s blcjgest snowman was starting +o fall apart. So I came up with be-Htr idea for our snowball.
E-Very +lme 1+ snows, tKe kids from VJKlrley Street use our Kill for sledding, even tKou^K H Ish’t tKelr neloKborKood.
So iomorrow morning, wKen +Ke VlKirley S+ree+ kids cone marcking up our Kill, me and Rowley are going +o +eack +kose guys a lesson.
iXursday
VJKeh
X
woke up +kis morning, +ke snow was already s+ar+ing +o mel+. So X fold Rowley +o kurry up anti get down +o
you
know how i+ oil 0o+ s+or+ej.
'Thors joy
In school +o
To
t)« hohes+ wi+k you, X +kihk +kaVs a really dumb message +o be +ellihg kids, especially +ke ohes a+ my school.
La+er oh, ikey made ah ahhouhcemeh-f -+ka+
+kere are Some opehihgs oh +ke Safety Pa+rols, ahd +ka+ go+ me +kihkihg.
Tf
someohe picks oh a Sa-fe-ty Patrol, i+ cah ge+ +kem suspehded. Xke way X
fi$vrt
<+, X cah use ahy ex+ra pro+ec-tioh X cah ge+.
Plus, X realized +ka+ maybe beihg ih a posi+ioh of
au+kori-ty could be good
for
me.
x
;rx x
f
Mr
-
Whit
/ “~u ~w „
l
«
Ct
v
"
PS
'J^SJ-fa - so~tU,
ISJ'
m
T "
p
u
*>•j“■*
h
*
W
“ °"
r
^ W
3
“ tk« spot.
Mr. Vlinsky said the openings were fior a special assignment. Our school is right next to the elementary school, and they've got a halfi-day kindergarten -there.
He wants us +o walk -the morning session kids hone in -the middle
of
-the day. X realized that meant we would miss twenty minutes
of
Pre-Algebra. Rowley must have -figured that out, too, because he started to speak up. But X gave him a wicked pinch underneath the desk befiore he could -finish
X couldn't believe my luck. X was getting instant bully protection and a -free pass firom halfi
of
Pre-Algebra, and X didn’t even have to lifit a finger.
XVi idling you, X've got i+ made witk tkis Safety Patrol tking.
At 12:15, me and Rowley left sckool and walked tke kindergartners kome. Xke wkole trip a+e up forty-five minutes, and tkere were only twenty mnutes
of
Pre-Algefcra left wken we got tack.
Vlalking tke kids kome was no sweat. But one of tke kindergartners started to smell a lit-He funny, and X tkink mayke ke kad an accident in kis pants.
He tried to let me know atout it, tut X just stared straigkt akead and kept walking. XII take tkese kids kome, tut kelieve me, X didn’t sign up for any diaper duty.
FEBRUARY
Vlcdnesday
Today it snowed for the first tine this winter, and school was canceled. VJe were supposed to have a test in Pre-Algebra, and X’ve kind of slacked
off
ever since X became a Safety Patrol. So X was psyched.
X called Rowley and told him to come over. Me and him have been talking about building the worlds biggest snowman for the past couple of years now.
And when X say the worlds biggest snowman, X'ni not kidding. Our goal is to get into the "Guinness Book of Viorid Records."
f»S/y
r
But every time weve gotten serious about gahg /or tHe record all tHe snow Has melted, arid we've missed our window of opportunity. So +his year, X wanted to get started rigHt away.
VJHen Rowley came over, we started rolling tHe first snowball to make tHe base. X figured tHe base was going to Have to be at least eigHt feet tall on its own if we wanted to Have a sHot at breaking tHe record. But tHe snowball got real Heavy, and we Had to take a buncH of breaks in between rolls so we could catcH our breatH
Poring one
of
our breaks, Mon cane oo+side +o
30 +0
+He grocery s+ore, but oor snowball was blocking Her car in. So we go+ a li+-He
frtt
labor
00
+
of
Her.
After oor break, ne and Rowley yosHed +Ha+ snowball on+il we cooldn*+ yosH it any far+Her. Bo+ wHen we looked beHind os, we saw +He ness we Had nade.
Our plan to build tKe world’s blcjgest snowman was starting +o fall apart. So I came up with be-Htr idea for our snowball.
E-Very +lme 1+ snows, tKe kids from VJKlrley Street use our Kill for sledding, even tKou^K H Ish’t tKelr neloKborKood.
So iomorrow morning, wKen +Ke VlKirley S+ree+ kids cone marcking up our Kill, me and Rowley are going +o +eack +kose guys a lesson.
iXursday
VJKeh
X
woke up +kis morning, +ke snow was already s+ar+ing +o mel+. So X fold Rowley +o kurry up anti get down +o
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