Diggers by Terry Pratchett Read Free Book Online

Nisodemus vibrated with a peculiarly hungry kind of eagerness that was unpleasant to see. He gave him as sharp a look as he dared.
    â€œHumans out here might be different from the ones in the Store,” he snapped. “Anyway—”
    â€œOrder must have sent it,” said Nisodemus. “It’s a judgment, um, on us!”
    â€œNone of that. It’s just a human,” said Dorcas. Nisodemus glared at him as he went on. “Now, we really should be sending some of the women and children to the—”
    There was the sound of running feet outside, and the gate guards piled in through the crack.
    â€œIt’s back! It’s back!” panted Sacco. “The human’s back!”
    â€œAll right, all right,” said Dorcas. “Don’t worry about it, it can’t—”
    â€œNo! No! No!” yelled Sacco, jumping up and down. “It’s got a pair of cutter things! It’s cut the wire and the chain that holds the gates shut, and it—!”
    They didn’t hear the rest of it.
    They didn’t need to.
    The sound of an engine coming closer said it all.
    It grew so loud that the shed shook, and then it stopped suddenly, leaving a nasty kind of silence that was worse than the noise. There was the crump of a metal door slamming. Then the rattle and squeak of the shed door.
    Then footsteps. The boards overhead buckled and dropped little clouds of dust as great thumping steps wandered around the office.
    The nomes stood in absolute silence. They moved nothing except their eyes, but they moved in perfect time to the footsteps, marking the position, flicking backward and forward as the human crossed the room above. A baby started to whimper.
    There was some clicking, and then the muffled sound of a human voice making its usual incomprehensible noises. This went on for some time.
    Then the footsteps left the office again. The nomes could hear them crunching around outside, and then more noises. Nasty, clinking metal noises.
    A small nome said, “Mum, I want the lavatory, Mum—”
    â€œShh!”
    â€œI really mean it, Mum!”
    â€œWill you be quiet!”
    All the nomes stood stock-still as the noises went on around them. Well, nearly all. One small nome hopped from one foot to the other, going very red in the face.
    Eventually the noise stopped. There was the thunk of a truck door closing, the growl of its engine, and the motor noise died away.
    Dorcas said, very quietly, “I think perhaps we can relax now.”
    Hundreds of nomes breathed a sigh of relief.
    â€œMum!”
    â€œYes, all right, off you go.”
    And after the sigh of relief, the outbreak of babble. One voice rose above the rest.
    â€œIt was never like this in the Store!” said Nisodemus, climbing onto a half brick. “I ask you, fellow nomes, is this what we were led, um, to expect?”
    There was a mumble chorus of “noes” and “yeses” as Nisodemus went on: “A year ago we were safe in the Store. Do you remember what it was like at Christmas Fayre? Do you remember what it was like in the Food Hall? Anyone remember, um, roast beef and turkey?”
    There were one or two embarrassed cheers. Nisodemus looked triumphant. “And here we are at the same time of year—well, they tell us it’s the same time of year,” he said, sarcastically, “—and what we’re expected to eat are knobbly things actually grown in dirt ! Um. And the meat isn’t proper meat at all, it’s just dead animals cut up! Actual dead animals, actually cut up! Is this what you want your, um, children to get used to? Digging up their food? And now they tell us we might even have to go to some barn that hasn’t even got proper floorboards for us to live under as Arnold Bros (est. 1905) intended. Where next, we ask ourselves? Out in a field somewhere? Um. And do you know what is the worst thing about all of this? I’ll tell you.”