Discretion by David Balzarini Read Free Book Online

she has to be with friends somewhere…hello? Marc?…fuck.”
    He slaps the phone shut and carefully places it in his pocket. A blind man could see my father is containing himself.
    “What is it?” The silence is lethal.
    “AMBER Alert. Marc is calling the sheriff for an AMBER Alert. He insists that Natalie must be missing, like his daughter would never just take off with friends for a good time. Must be a saint.”
    “I’ve been thinking…”
    “And?”
    “Someone had to have seen her leave,” my hands are frantic in the air. “The lake was crowded all day.”
    “Colin, you know that after the sun goes down, the crowds leave. And who would notice some teenager jumping off a boat? People do that all day long. Nothing notable there, I’m afraid.”
    “But if she left…I mean, if she were taken.”
    My father restrains himself from laughing, but only for a moment. “That would have been noticed. A teenager screaming her lungs out. And I think I’d have woken up, don’t you?”
    I nod. “That’s what I’m saying. It doesn’t make sense. She wouldn’t just leave without telling me or you. Even if she was mad, she’s not rude like that. She’d let us know. So…damn. What happened here?”
    My father sighs again. “She saw friends, decided to jump aboard with them to chat and then…took off without realizing she said nothing to you or me. Then…being a teenage girl, she doesn’t think to call or tell anyone else. She may even be trying to find her way back, if she feels badly enough.”
    “You don’t care for Natalie.”
    He sits next to me and pats my leg. “She’s fine, son. But a teenager. She’s not going to think all this stuff through. She’ll turn up and have no idea anyone was looking for her. Then her father will be the jackass who called the cops when it was entirely unnecessary.”
    Silence settles in. I imagine this is what it feels like being slowly boiled alive—doom is imminent, but the precise time of death is unknown.
    “What the hell am I to do now?” I say, giving in to the situation.
    “Calm down. She’ll turn up, son,” my father says, though I know he’s patronizing me. It takes a moment to realize he’s trying to reassure me. “If she left against her wishes…no, that doesn’t make sense. If she were to be picked up while asleep, it’s safe to assume she would wake up and make noise, which we would have heard and other people would have seen…” He looks around, sniffs, scratches a leg, fidgets a little, and then says, “She had to have left by choice, son. She has to be with someone she knows. Cops and people are everywhere up here with it being the holiday weekend…who would try…”
    “Then why not say something? Why not wake me up…you know, let me know?” I shrug, having the courage to face only the deep blue carpet of the boat.
    “Maybe she was embarrassed son…or maybe she thought it would just be a minute then lost track of time. Could happen.”
    There’s no room for argument. I need Christel right now. I know nothing of Natalie’s whereabouts. I’m helpless and need her guidance. It’s hard to even admit the possibilities—to stomach the thought that she may be gone from my life. “Could she have gone for a swim… and drowned?”
    My father smirks at this. “She might have referred to herself as a weak swimmer—if she’s comparing to professionals.” He shakes his head, attention on the water and the few scattered boats in sight. “She can swim. I know. I saw. I’m not convinced that she’d drown.”
    I accept his answer and watch two boats in the distance make way back to the marina; their bright lights are as candles on gentle waves. “So now what do we do?”
    My father swears quietly to himself, at the open space of water. “We wait. Sheriff will be here shortly.”
    Time passes and minutes feel like a hammer against my heart—an ache to my core. I know she is gone. I just know. My father doesn’t get it, and I’ve no