Faith and Fidelity by Tere Michaels Read Free Book Online Page B

He wanted— he wanted more. He wanted to have someone hold him and stroke his hair and say that everything was all right— even if he knew it wasn't.
    His own sexuality had never been a question, he'd never really thought about it. He'd met Sherri at the tail end of puberty and fallen deeply in love with her— they lost their virginity together, at sixteen. And that was it. He could look at other women, acknowledge their beauty, their sex appeal, but it never crossed his mind to take it a step farther than that. Sherri turned him on. Sherri satisfied his sexual urges. So that made him straight, right?
    Except this encounter with Matt had thrown him for a loop. How could he tell this man, Yes, I felt something for you last night. No, I'm not sure what it is. I wish to God I could try and find out, but to feel this for another person is just too terrifying and overwhelming.
    Matt had rolled over, facedown, sprawled across the entire mattress. Toweled dry and dressed, Evan stopped at the edge, seeing the man in his bed as if for the first time. Solidly built body, thick brown hair. He liked the way Matt's eyes smiled at him all day yesterday. Liked the way Matt walked, powerful. Commanding. Liked the way Matt's hand had touched him last night, brushing away the pain with each stroke.
    Come on, Evan. Say it. Like Sherri always did.
    Abruptly, Evan turned and walked out of the bedroom. He headed for Miranda's room and knocked softly on the door.
    She was awake, her clock radio playing softly. The school cancellations.
    “Hey, Daddy,” she said sleepily. “We're all home for the day. I just heard the elementary school announced.”
    “Yeah, I figured. Listen, Matt's going to stay here for the day, until I get home.”
    “Geeze— you think we need a babysitter? I'm sixteen!” Miranda came alive, sitting straight up in her bed.
    “I know, I know, but humor me, okay? What if there's trouble with the furnace or the electricity? What if you need to get somewhere? You can't drive alone yet— and certainly not in this kind of weather.”
    Miranda sighed her displeasure, but Evan could see she wasn't going to argue.
    “Besides, he'll keep the kids busy so you don't have to entertain them all day.”
    “See? Now that's a big plus— you should have mentioned that first.”
    Evan had to smile at that. He crossed the room to drop a kiss on her head. “Could you try and make sure they don't torment Matt too much?” he asked as he turned to go.
    “Hey, Daddy— he's real nice. I'm glad you made a friend like him.”
    A pain was starting to form behind Evan's right eye. Guilt? Stress? Exhaustion? All of the above. “Yeah. And thanks for inviting him to stay yesterday. He had a good time I think.”

    * * * *

    Miranda curled back down under the covers. “He looked lonely.”
    “Yeah.”
    “Bye, Daddy.”
    “Bye, kiddo. I'll see you tonight.”
    He shut the door behind him and hurried downstairs. He needed to get out of the house as soon as possible. Before Matt woke up. He just couldn't do this right now.
    Evan jotted a quick note for him and left it on the fridge. He promised to be home as early as possible. Told him to call if there was a problem. Thanked him again for this huge favor.
    And oh, by the way, about last night...
    He quickly bundled up and headed for the back door— shortest distance to the car— and pulled out the shovel he left inside the broom closet. It helped him work off some of his tension to dig a quick path to the driveway.

    * * * *

    How he managed to beat Helena— from Queens no less— to the station was beyond him. He was at his desk by nine. So was Moses. And that was the squad.
    “Just you and me, dear Evan. Hey, did you know that the government has been controlling our weather patterns for the last fifty years? They have these satellites... No kidding... ”
    He sighed. Couldn't he have ended up with someone less chatty?
    An hour later a bedraggled Helena stomped in. She looked like