Gina and Mike by Buffy Andrews Read Free Book Online Page A

up. He grabbed his T-shirt at his shoulders and pulled it over his head. There was just enough moonlight to see the ring of thorns that wrapped around his right bicep.
    “Looks like the weight lifting is paying off,” I said, reaching out to touch his tattoo.
    Mike sat down on the sleeping bag and held out his arm. “Come here.”
    I sat down beside him. He brushed my hair off my face. “You’re so beautiful.”
    I closed my eyes as he outlined my lips with his thumb.  I opened my mouth and his finger slipped inside and I playfully bite it and circled it with the tip of my tongue.
    I tried to focus on Mike, his gorgeous, thick curls and beautiful smile. I ran my fingers through his hair and I heard him moan softly. I played with his ear and let my fingers trail down to his lips. I rubbed my fingers over his lips and down to his chin before I pulled his head toward me and found his soft lips. Playful kisses led to deep kisses and I felt the familiar tingle I hadn’t felt since before the rape. So far, so good. I rubbed my hand over Mike’s chest and down his arms. He slid his hands under my shirt, unhooked my bra and slipped my shirt over my head. We hugged bare chest against bare chest. He was warm and it felt good being next to his skin. I reached down to unzip his jeans.
    “I’ll take care of this,” he said, and wiggled off his jeans and boxers. I saw his boxers in the moonlight and it sent me reeling back to the rape. His boxers were the same blue boxers Smith had worn. I could see the Fruit of the Loom tag .  
    I was squirming on the cold vinyl floor. Tears flooded my face. The gag hurt my mouth. I felt the panic. I couldn’t breathe. I wanted to escape but I didn’t know how. I could smell Coach Smith, the beer and stale smoke.  I could feel him tearing me apart inside. It hurt. I could hear his skin slapping mine as he rammed into me and told me how much I liked what he was doing.  I watched his hips move back and forth as he violated me.
    Heavy sobs wracked my body and Mike held me in his arms. “It’s OK, Gina, baby. Everything’s OK. You’re safe. I’m not going to hurt you. No one’s going to hurt you.”
    Mike got dressed and dressed me and kissed me on the forehead and we laid there on the sleeping bag under our tree.
    “Gina,” Mike whispered after awhile. “It’s OK. We don’t have to try that again. I’m all right just laying here beside you and holding you.”
    I’m not sure when I stopped sobbing that night. I cried for what I had lost. I cried because I felt that I would never be the same person I was before it all happened. Mostly, I cried because I realized that it was only a matter of time before I was going to leave Mike. He deserved better than what I was able to give him. I couldn’t be the girl he wanted me to be. That girl was gone.
    Maybe forever.
     
    ****
     
    Mike
     
    I’m not sure what happened. Everything was going great. Gina seemed relaxed. I was letting her lead. I didn’t want to move too fast and then turn her off. After she unzipped my jeans, I took them off. That’s when Gina freaked. It was like Jekyll and Hyde. One minute she was all into it and the next minute she wasn’t.
    I’ve never seen Gina act this way. Watching her was like watching a runaway train. It just keeps going and you feel so helpless because you know it’s going to crash and there’s not a damn thing you can do to stop it. And it’s the crash that I was worried about.  How bad will it be? The casualty count? About all I could do was hold Gina and let her sob.
    I was beginning to wonder, though, if something sexual happened to Gina that she couldn’t talk about. There had to be some reason why she froze every time we got past kissing and touching. It’s about the only thing that made sense. Maybe something happened with J.R.  I knew they played tennis a lot and they didn’t seem to play as much lately.
    I knew that Gina thought of J.R. as a brother but that he loved her and