even among Reapers, Demetrius was known for his sadism. Most of us went in and did the job we were given. Everyone and everything died eventually. We were just the instrument of that universal truth. But not Demetrius. He relished the killing. He reveled in it. It fed his soul, made him stronger and completely heartless. And Iâd nearly followed the same path. Until the day a scheduling snafu had brought me to a patch of woods in Make Believe. Until Tess.
I shifted uncomfortably, my muscles stiff from sitting for so long. At least, thatâs what I told myself. Iâm sure it had nothing to do with the sins weighing heavily on my soul. Maybe I shouldâve been in the AA meeting with Tess and Lavender, facing my demons with everyone else.
Hi, my name is Nate Grimm, and I have a problem . . .
I laughed out loud in the confines of the car. God, even my name was a lie. I couldnât even tell the truth about something that basic. How in the hell was I going to tell Tess everything else? The last time Iâd tried to come clean, things between us had nearly ended before they got started.
I ran my hand down my face, suddenly weary. I wondered how sheâd see me, what sheâd think of me, when I finally grew a pair and spilled my guts to her. I imagined the first thing sheâd do was clock me. Then sheâd probably spit in my face and tell me to go fuck myself. And I couldnât blame her if she did. If Iâd had even a modicum of integrity, I wouldâve left her alone, stayed away instead of insinuating myself into her life and becoming an integral part of it. It would serve me right if she left me and never looked back.
As I sat there waiting for the meeting to end, I hardened my heart with resolve, vowing Iâd tell Tess everything, share every ugly secret I harbored. And suffer the consequences. Because there was no doubt Iâd suffer one way or another.
At that moment, the doors to the cathedral opened and my beautiful Tess emerged into the evening sunlight, breathtaking in her loveliness even from where I was parked across the street toward the back of the lot. She briefly lifted her face to the summer breeze, inhaling deeply, her lips curving into a contented smile. She loved the wind on her face, I knew. Iâd seen her lift her face this way on many occasions over the years when she thought I wasnât looking.
Tess was so afraid to be seen as weak, vulnerable, that few people ever got a chance to glimpse that softer side of herâthe side that ached when her friends were hurting, that wept when sheâd failed to protect the ones she loved, that would say a few kind words to a woman struggling with her guilt and grief and give her hope on a night when years of being buried in a bottle could no longer numb the pain.
But I saw it all, had witnessed it that day in the woods when Iâd seen the depth of her love for her fellow Tales. And I wanted to feel that love, to wrap it around me, immerse myself in its healing warmth. Over the years Iâd seen Tess save more lives than I could count. And I prayed that maybeâjust maybe âshe could save me, too.
My God, she was everything to me. Maybe one day Iâd actually deserve her. I sure as shit was going to spend the rest of my days trying.
I got out of the car and took in the surroundings at a glance, searching for any threats, but aside from the cab driver who seemed to think he was in a race car instead of a bright yellow minivan, it was all clear. When she caught sight of me, her smile grew.
Ah, that smile .
No matter what kind of day Iâd had, I knew as long as I saw that smile, all was right with the world. I jerked my chin in greeting.
And then he was there. Standing just behind her. His eyes aflame with deranged glee.
Oh, God.
âNo!â The word burst from me in a roar as I bolted forward. I tried to dematerialize to get to her more quickly, but I couldnât. What the fuck? My