Heartless by Cheryl Douglas Read Free Book Online Page A

know.”
    Derek took a sip
of his coffee before responding. “Mike’s a cop. It goes with the territory. If
you’re not suspicious of everyone, it’s only because you haven’t been doin’ it
long enough.”
    She sighed. “I
guess you’re right. And Jay got his heart broken a while back.” She shook her
head. “His college girlfriend dumped him after two years together. Poor kid,
he’s never really gotten over it.”
    Derek shot a sidelong
glance in her direction. “I know how he feels.”
    She rested her
hand on his forearm. “I never meant to hurt you back then; I need you to know
that. I thought…” Did she have the courage to tell him that she broke up with
him to teach him a lesson? “We always had this amazing connection. I never
imagined you’d really let me go.”
    He frowned. “Are
you tellin’ me that you broke up with me because you wanted me to start bein’
the boyfriend you deserved?”
    She laughed.
“Something like that. I didn’t want you to take me for granted anymore. I
wanted you to appreciate me and what we had.”
    “Ash, I did. I
knew, even back then, that you were the best thing that ever happened to me.”
    “With age comes
wisdom, right?” She traced her finger around the rim of her coffee cup,
refusing to look at him. “Instead of just talking to you, trying to work it
out, I decided to end it to try and teach you a lesson.” She tried to smile, to
pretend it didn’t still hurt thinking about where they went wrong. “That was
immature, but then, so was I back then. I was only twenty. What the hell did I
know about relationships, right?”
    He smirked. “You
probably knew a hell of a lot more than I did.” He looked her in the eye. “The
only thing I knew for sure was that I’d never felt about another girl the way I
felt about you.”
    She clasped her
hands around her mug as she tried to still her racing heart. “That’s sweet.”
    “That’s the truth.
It’s still true to this day. You’re the only woman I’ve ever really loved.” He
sighed. “I’d be lyin’ if I said I haven’t been with my fair share of women over
the years, tryin’ to find the right one . But eventually I had to admit
to myself that I met that girl when I was just a kid. Too damn young to
know a good thing when I had it.”
    It was a small
consolation to know that he shared her sentiment. They were the love of each
other’s lives, but they still lived those lives apart. Even if he moved back to
Nashville, there was a seemingly insurmountable roadblock in their path: her
sons.
    “What’re you
thinkin’?” he asked.
    “I’m thinking
about the past, the future, the present. Where the hell do we go from here?”
    He shook his head.
“I wish I knew. This time last week, my team and I were workin’ on a
high-profile serial killer case that was startin’ to consume me. Now here I am,
back home, grievin’ my brother and tryin’ to make sense of my life. The things
that mattered to me before, like work, don’t seem to matter as much when I
realize that life is too damn short to live this way.”
    She refused to
read too much into his comment. He was still confused, still grieving. He could
wake up tomorrow, find out there was a break in the case, hop on a plane, and
never look back. This conversation would be just another memory in their
catalogue. “Does that mean you’re thinking about making a change?”
    He shrugged.
“Hell, I don’t know. I know there are a lot of people who think I should, but
this is still my life. I have to do what’s gonna make me happy.”
    “What would make
you happy?”
    He smiled. “Bein’
with you.” He took her hand, turned it over, and pressed his lips to her palm.
“But I know that would create a rift with your kids and that would make you
unhappy. I don’t wanna do that to you, sweetheart.”
    There was no sense
denying his claim. They both knew it was true.
    “I’d never forgive
myself if havin’ a relationship with me cost you a